Donahoe has finally come up with a coherent description of the new eBay: It’s not Amazon, or even Overstock.com. It’s an online big-box discounter, like Costco.

Oh, that's a great plan, Donahoe.

Only problem is, Costco is ALREADY online. So why in the hell would I deal with the idiots at eBay, when I can get the same (or better) deals from Costo? Oh, that's right - I wouldn't.

eBay's whole purpose online is to function as an auction site - something they've now hopelessly f'ed up over the past 5 years, chasing away sellers by the thousands and leaving buyers with absolutely no reason to visit anymore. Now, everybody goes to Craigslist.

The attempt to become another Amazon has been an abject failure, leaving eBay a shriveling also-ran. Their new attempt to position themselves as an "online Costco" only makes sense is if you're an overpaid American executard drunk on your own massive ego and enormous stupidity. It's about as crazy as Sony deciding to open a chain of fried chicken restaurants to compete with KFC, Bank of America announcing they're going to begin manufacturing appliances to compete with Whirlpool, or Kotex unveiling a new line of toothpastes and mouthwashes to compete with Crest.

The only thing that's "turned around" is media hype, as big investors strive to pump up eBay's justifiably depressed stock value so they can turn around and dump it, leaving suckers holding the bag.

The fact is, eBay's traffic continues to tank. Less traffic = fewer buyers = fewer sales. You had a good thing going, and you f'ed it up. Buh-bye, eBozos!

In order for them to become a national selling site, they will have to come up with a plan to get rid of or otherwise deal with the vast number of scammers plaguing Craiglist, both on the selling and the buying side.

I was buying a car about a year ago on Craiglist when I got some very bad vibes from a particular seller, I ended up not meeting with them because I was afraid it was someone looking for a cash laden buyer to rob. I later found a car on Cl where I didn't get those vibes. I could have been completely wrong about the first seller but I've learned to trust my instincts.

eBay has gone the way of my local flea market, which used to be a place to go and see the stuff people were hauling out of their attic, basement, garage but now is overwhelmed with the very cheapest of cheap Chinese mass produced crap.

On a lot of items I find I can now get a better price on Amazon than I can on eBay and Amazon is somewhat easier to deal with. For a lot of items, Amazon is now my first resort where eBay used to be. Advantage Amazon.

eBay traffic? Down and still trending down for months on end.

eBay profits? Not bad, but coming at the expense of things like 21 day holds on PayPal withdrawals by sellers (huge float to draw interest there), increased fees and just generally the generation of a lot of ill will among all but the largest sellers.

Evidence of turnaround? Apparently the stock price. And what does the price of a stock really tell us? I submit that except in the case of a company in severe distress, it tells us nothing more than stock investors still move in herds.

eBay turning around? Ya know, from my perspective as a small occasional seller there in days gone by, the answer has to be a resounding no. eBay has well and truly lost touch with its roots. It's on the way to doing what all corporations seem to do eventually and that is utterly forgetting who they are, where they came from and what it was they originally set out to do.

Turning around? No. A blip in the stock price? Sure.

The problem with eBay is that it screws its sellers in 3 ways:

(1) Listing fees. These are the up-front fees that sellers expect to pay. The higher the price (or starting bid) of an item, the higher the fee. This is a charge that sellers expect to pay, but...

(2) Then eBay charges "final value fees." So you're getting charged twice for the same thing. Really! And eBay expects their sellers to be OK with that?

(3) THEN eBay's proprietary money-transfer service, PayPal (which you HAVE to use in order to buy and sell on eBay), also charges you at a similar rate.

So let's sum this up: First you get charged for setting up a sale. Then you get charged for getting the sale. Then you get charged for the sale going through.

In the end, eBay tries to suck you dry for nearly 10% of your sale. That car you sold for $5,000? eBay gets $500. That vintage book you sold for $150? eBay gets $15 or more.

Meanwhile, all sorts of specialty sites have cropped up where people can buy and sell specific types of items. They charge consumers less than half of what eBay charges, and they are growing exponentially in popularity.

So why does eBay insist on screwing its loyal customers?

Because at the moment, they can get away with it.

This moment will not last. eBay needs to either roll back its fees, or watch its market dominance slip irrevocably away.

I used to love eBay. It was so much fun to see all the interesting, unique items for sale. I liked the small sellers who were cleaning out their closets, not the big box store crap from China. Now the crap from China is all that's left. When they drove out the small sellers, they ruined the site. They have no respect for, or understanding of, their customers. I don't shop there at all anymore, and I won't return. No one else I know shops there anymore either. If I want to shop at Costco, I'll shop at Costco.

And the ever-volatile Jim Cramer rebuffed viewer demands to put Donahoe on his gimmicky “CEO Wall of Shame,” saying the stock could rally further.

Whatever that big bag of bullshit says, I run in the opposite direction, as I have since before the dotcom crash. The easiest contrarian approach to investing ever: When Cramer says buy, sell.

I guess it's time to sell my EBAY.