Every single time I fly for the rest of my life, this will be the scenario:

I tell the officer who waves me through the metal detector that I have an artificial hip joint. He ignores, waves me through and of course I set off the detector. He then waves me into a little pen, where I get to stand for 10, 15, 20 minutes until they can locate a female security officer who isn't on a break to wand and pat me down.

The only upside to this is that I've finally convinced my husband that we really do need to arrive at the airport more than five minutes before our plane is schedule to board.

You know, reading through these letters really makes me think about the fact that I carry an epi-pen and am never questioned about it. Granted, if I couldn't carry the epi I wouldn't even get on the flight as any of my allergens being triggered without me having the epi is instant death for me.

But, really, I could have any injectible gel in that epi. I can certainly overpower someone with it. If you've ever had an epi you know it packs a wollap with your heart rate and a freaky feeling.

All I can say Patrick, is you're lucky you don't have a concussion after getting lippy with a TSA officer:

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=3906861&cl=8754245&ch=4226713&src=news

I never get tired of your rantings about these thugs and their ridiculous rules.

Anyone remember the Tracy Ullman skit, where she played Shaneesha, an overzealous, full of herself airport security checkpoint worker whose delight in life was to haul someone out of line, and subject them to a full "body check."

The minute someone got sassy with her, she'd start yelling

"Body Search! Body Search!" and she'd haul the person off to the side and start waving her wand at them and threatening a cavity search.

This is genius...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-QUUYsT0rE&NR=1

So there, in a nutshell, is the typical person who now works for TSA. Fact is, she's probably been promoted to SUPERVISOR by now, so she can train all the new recruits...

Some more fun with Shaneesha...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=P_WeCJZagdQ

http://youtube.com/watch?v=0EtLSelmwd4

http://youtube.com/watch?v=xm_N6Y25EQ4

Sure, some of the TSA officers are petty bureaucrats who get off by exercising their "authority" to make our lives miserable. (Tampa International is particularly horrible.)

That said: the problem isn't the agents doing the checks. They are told to enforce the rules. Often times, the rules are made stupider than necessary to make them easier to enforce and less ambiguous. Instead of coming up with a complex algorithm to explain the types of knives that are and aren't okay, they just say "no knives whatsoever". Hey, at least we're a nation of laws and not of men; the alternative would open the door to race, gender, and age-based profiling for who got to carry on danger items and who didn't. So everyone has to follow the same stupid rules.

At base the problem is the people who make the stupid rules. The solution to this problem might seem like complaining to your congressperson; but I don't think that'll work. No congressperson is ever going to want to be on the record as voting against security regulations, even if those security regulations are a farce that don't particularly decrease the (already tiny) risk of something bad happening on a plane.

I wonder what sorts of acts of civil disobedience might be used to protest these stupid rules? Like, what would Ghandi do? Maybe we should all start going to the airports as close to naked as possible, and carrying through as little as possible (like a small wallet or satchel). They're starting to use those awful machines that virtually strip you naked: let's just play the game better.

Careful. I understand the sentiment, but that's sure to detract from the real issue, which is that in general the people most attracte to power are the last ones who should have it.

I'm from a rocky mountain state and I can tell the caucasian TSA people at home-all gung ho about protecting Bum Fuck Montana from the terrorists-make the big city TSA people (who seem to represent many ethnicities, including caucasian) seem positively chill.

As a side comment, New York TSA people have by-and-large been extremely curteous and have exhibited a sense of humor I can only assume comes from dealing with too many people every day to sweat each one.

WE HAVE TO DO THIS BECAUSE OTHERWISE "ARAB TERRORISTS" WOULD BE ABLE TO MAGICALLY CAUSE SKYSCRAPERS TO COLLAPSE BY USING OUR AIRPLANES AND THEIR SCARY MAGIC CARPET HOODOO.

Honestly. What won't you people put up with? Stop flying. The airlines will be safe when they're bankrupt and all that ancient Boeing steel is rusting somewhere, unused.

As for TSA -- Christ, what won't you put up with? Facts don't affect them. They're drinking the Kool-Aid. Scary liquids over three ounces Must Be Confiscated?

If you can't cattle-prod ("Taser") them for overt and willful stupidity and if it's illegal to shoot them to death for being fascistic morons, DON'T FLY.

Fear now permeates most of our lives.....the 9/11 episode was perfect for creating agencies that in the guise of protecting us have invaded our civil liberties. With airlines struggling with gas prices and beginning to charge for every item that used to be free and security not allowing "liquid" including bottled water, if I can drive the distance in 8 hours I am not flying.

Tracey Ullman also did another character more recently, this time it's another TSA staffer named Chanel Monticello...

http://youtube.com/watch?v=tMFh0XXkU1Y

Best line, to a woman with a pair of tweezers:

"You can not take those pilot killers on a plane! You could kill a pilot with these. You could disable a steward with these."

"Ipods away, Ipods away..."