I can tell you're a professional pilot and aeronautical engineer supreme, what with you handy usage of such technical jargon as "thingies" and "foom"!

Apparently Air France recently stopped serving croque-monsieur as a snack on its Paris-Reunion flights because it was discovered that gruyere can be quickly and easily converted into a crude explosive using simple items that would not be normally prohibited from one's carry-on luggage.

What would the cheese-to-explosive conversion process be? And what snack, if any, did Air France substitute for Parisians flying to Reunion?

... the answer to the one about what percentage of fuel is used for take-off. It is probably un-answerable as asked, but if formulated as liters or gallons/min for different parts of a typical flight, maybe?

Fuel-economy in general is an interesting topic. More on that, please. Tell us stuff we didn't even know to ask about!

This column *can* become less relevant, and is now managing to do so weekly.

Q: What flights are available from Vizag on 14th October? Thanks & Regards.

Flights departing Vizag (VZG) on October 14:

• Svenborgia ($@©) - departs 10:23 GMT, and
• Grenarnia (£°ß) - departs 14:40 GMT.

Please note that, in order to book either of these flights, you need a credit check demonstrating a net worth of at least 2.5 million krugels†, knowledge of the secret handshake that only rich people know, and a time machine since those flights took off 12 days ago.

† Don't know what a Krugel is? Then you're obviously not rich enough to enter Svenborgia, let alone Grenarnia.

You post questions, but no answers. Seems you are missing the A of Q&A

in a little hair of the dog.

Nicely done!

I had a similar experience with dog hair. In addition, my suitcase had come unzipped and had opened up. Unlike the dog hair, my colorful Speedos did manage to stay attached as they were hanging on the side of the suitcase as they circled the luggage carousel in front of hundreds of amused onlookers. I wonder if the spandex reacts differently than the dog hair to whatever mystical forces are causing this.

The pilots of the 707 landing in LA during the movie "Earthquake" manage to takeoff again. I believe you pilots call this a "touch and go," correct?

Thanks for the great column.

The Ukrainian airline is called AEROSVIT, whereas Aeroflot is Russian. There are, of course, Aeroflot flights to Kyiv (note the proper spelling of the Ukrainian city) mostly from Moscow and other Russian points of origin. The author seems to imply that Aeroflot is a an Ukrainian airline.

Boo to that.

Just be grateful the hair is gone. If it stays on the luggage long enough, it starts to develop dandruff, and then you get - oh, no! - Flakes on a Plane.

JIM3CH...

Interesting article you posted, nice summary of static electricity. But I point out to you that in the article it says that the easiest way to create static charge is to rub two non-conducting materials together (i.e. luggage-luggage or luggage-conveyor band).

It is true that there is cosmic radiation coming in, but it is not that much. Indeed, if there was enough ionizing cosmic radiation to remove dog hairs from luggage during your flight, you would be dead.

Just to assure readers here who may have some fears of radiation while in the air, it IS true that you get hit by more cosmic rays in the upper atmosphere than you do on the ground, but the levels are still so low that the health risks are negligible, even for pilots and cabin crew.

You know, the dog hair thing is interesting. My guess is it was radiation that removed the static. But not from an X-ray machine; it was rather cosmic radiation received during the flight. Where did the hair go? It just fell off the case in the luggage hold. The short article below lends this theory some credence.

http://www.epa.gov/ttnamti1/files/ambient/pm25/qa/static.pdf

Hmm...the dog-hair question is interesting, but I think the X-ray machines are probably not the answer. If those machines were using THAT much ionizing radiation, you would have a serious ozone problem on your hands.

Instead, I think it has to do with the long journey your luggage takes. At the beginning and end of the trip it is travelling on conveyor bands made of heavy rubber. These could easily build up a nice static charge, that could attract the hairs. In the middle of the trip, the luggage is rubbing against all kinds of other bags, probably transferring the hair to its neighbors.

So my guess is that the hair ends up on or around the luggage bands, and on fellow passenger's bags.

Any other ideas?

Would that be an African or a European swallow?

Well, X-rays are ionizing radiation; perhaps they neutralized the static charge that was attracting the dog hair. Or some other factor (moisture?) did.

The market has spoken, Patrick. Enquiring minds want to know... where is the dog hair?

ANSWER THE QUESTION, SIR!!

Given their flammability and potentially explosive nature, I think you may have uncovered a major in-flight security risk!

I was on one flying out of LA. We jettisoned the fuel and landed in Vegas. The odd thing about the experience was that although the stated problem was that we had one engine go out, our captain appeared to be drunk. He came on the intercom and slurred something incomprehensible. The flight attendant took the mic afterwards and tried to calm everyone down, but it didn't really help much. I'm still wondering if the real problem was a problem with the captain.

I can't say how often this sort of thing occurs, but I'm not exactly a frequent flyer.

Okay, it was a little specific, but I want to know what happens to the dog...

I've spend a good bit of time riding buses around Latin America and have found that disaster movies of all kinds are a favorite.

I've always assumed it's because the TVs are so small no one can read the subtitles and they need something that you can enjoy without understanding what people are saying.

I think I've seen the one with Anne Heche where LA becomes a volcano a good four or five times.