But I do have a stapler! Yay, MLB Network!

Other than Glenn Greenwald, Salon has seemed a bit empty these past few days. Great to see your byline.

The line about staplers was exceptional. It reminds me what's missing.

Will you be on TV Thursday night?

Nothing else to say. I had become used to reading your column every day. I've missed you. Now I have to work during the time I used to spend reading your column.

King, I've been so hard up since you ended your daily that I have seriously considered working harder. Your work is missed!

Isn't that one of the NFL's main sponsors? I see an awful lot of ads about it during games.

an SAT way of saying pee pee pants?

Okay the Raiders and the Chargers are bad bad, or bad / mediocre. What are the Giants? A winning team, but mediocre. The Thursday night game will probably feature at least one defensive touchdown, several turnovers, and a field goal in overtime to win? That's better than watching the Giants and their masticating offense. (Occasionally Manning belches up an interception, and then its back to the table.)

Last years Superbowl match up was positively stultifying, and proves my point.

I recommend the NFL go to a BCS playoff system, that way at least we get an interesting match up.

What's it like wearing the editor pants? Pants in general?

How can we be so unlucky that Plaxico shoots himself while you're absent from the sportswriting scene? Let's talk Latin Quarter night club.

I just had to get that out of my system. I hope he doesn't have any relatives in Chicago.

King, have you considered trying to take over Tony Kornheiser's MNF job. I swear if someone doesn't get rid of him, he's gonna drive Jaworski into saying something bad on the air.

What are the Giants? A winning team, but mediocre. The Thursday night game will probably feature at least one defensive touchdown, several turnovers, and a field goal in overtime to win? That's better than watching the Giants and their masticating offense. (Occasionally Manning belches up an interception, and then its back to the table.)

I hope your point in writing this letter was to demonstrate that you are lacking in knowledge about the NFL. This was one of the dumbest things I've read in the letters section this year.

The mediocre Giants rank 4th in total offense and 3rd in total defense. They have the No.1 ranked rushing offense and they average more points per game than anyone else in the league. The mistake prone Eli Manning has thrown only 8 INTs this year and averages fewer INTs per attempt than Romo, Peyton, and MYP candidate Kurt Warner. So while they may chew up yards, their admittedly middle of the pack passing offense can sling it accurately when they need to.

The Giants are a complete team - that's why they are 11 and 1. Meanwhile the Top 5 passing teams? Mediocrity defined - Saints, Broncos, Cardinals, Texans, Eagles. Three of those teams will likely miss the playoffs. The Broncos and Cardinals will win the two weakest divisions in football. There's a very good chance that both of those teams will have poorer records than the second Wild Card team in their conferences.

Thank you. I haven't seen the word "micturition" used since I was in Anatomy & Physiology classes at UC, Berkeley over 30 years ago.

Unless you are a fantasy nut, and in my league the leader has Kurt Warner, you cannot feel much love for Eli Manning or the Giants. I traded Jacobs a few weeks ago, for Stephen Jackson. Often hurt, but very damned exciting. Burress shot himself, because this team is so boring. Sad sad, Madison Avenue will put out a hit on these guys if they make it to the Superbowl. The Giants are probably responsible for the recession or worse. Maybe you are a bean counter that all these numbers make you giddy.

I actually pay for a Comcast sports tier package -- yeah, I know, sneer away; I like watching soccer, so whatever. I could, theoretically watch the NFL Network. But really, they've really fallen short in developing quality programming. You would think that a network closely affiliated with NFL Films could produce quality documentaries on the sport's history, but so far they really have not done all that much but endless Top Ten lists and game replays.

And did I mention that they occasionally give a microphone to, and point a camera at, Deion Sanders?