No I couldn't.

in sincereness,

w.

Hey there Obama...err...is it Osama? Heck with the both of ya being Muslims and so tall I can't really tell which one of ya is which being as my head is already where the sun never shines anyway.

Well whichever one ya are, don't get to used to hangin round for too long. Saw my daddy just last week sayin my brother, Jeb, ought to give this job a try. Yeah, that's right. Keep that seat warm for little brother Jeb in 4 years becuz we're gonna smoke ya out!

Dubya43

P.S. Dubya43-I like that. I'm gonna have Laura try to get that on my license plates so everybody gets out of my way when they see me a comin!

someone sent me this:

"Hey Barack: I should probably tell ya, Barney used to pee over behind that couch a lot. Might be able to smell it on rainy days. Oh, and I already looked for Lincoln's gold, didn't find shit. I did find an old stamp in the bottom drawer and licked it, in case it was some of Carter's acid. I think I saw on Saturday Night Live that he used to do that stuff, right? Anyway, it was too old, didn't fuck me up at all.

"Oh, and don't push the button under the chair. I had Big Red moved down there in case the White House got stormed by Arab commandos and I'd have to get all Han Solo on 'em, blowing up their shit while they thought they had me covered. Can't take any chances, man.

"Okay, I'm outta here. Semper Fi. Wait, you weren't a grunt, that was that other black fella, whatsisname...Simon Cowell or something. Whatever. Anyway, the place is yours now. If you're ever in Dallas, look me up, we'll throw some brisket on the grill and do some a that Wii bowling. You ever done that? Hell, found a whole room for 'em to put that in, right off the Oval Office. That's the one Harding used for...well, anyhow, I gotta go. Have a good one. Fuckin' A, man."

W

you CAN fool all the peoples all the time and get away with it.

Later, Dude.

Shrub

This is my advice: Don't take advice from anybody. I sure didn't and I got reelected anyway. Oh, and I wouldn't bother spending any of that political capital on that next $350 billion for the banks -- the fundamentals of the economy really are strong. Call if you need advice on anything else.

W.

Dear Mr. President. Concerning our agreement that if I don't pardon anyone, you won't prosecute me. Please, please, please don't go back on your word! It's the rest of my administration who are guilty! I trusted them, and they let me down! They are the ones who belong in prison! I don't think I could survive in prison! Just the thought of a large brother named TYRONNE sends shivers down my backside.

Signed, 43

Do ya thunk that this note, at least, will be made available via The Presidential Records Act?

Don't misunderestimate the will of the voters, and you can have my Segway out back. Oh, and watch your head when you board the helicopter, and don't drop your new dog on the tarmac or let it bite reporters, even if they deserve it.

Thursday is beans day in the cafeteria. I like beans.

Your pal,

W