Dont let terrists get nucular wepons. Al Kayda is determined to attack Merica. We must find him first. God bless Merica!

If our homeland is attacked in the next several months, I will be responsible. If terrorists wait until September, the buck will stop with you!!

#44... Executive orders will give you the headiest buzz! Don't let the naysayers get you down. Order! Order! Order!

This note well self distract after it's finished reading by the reader. I mean destruct the self of itself for the reader by him reading it after he's done. Err... won't explode again. Crap I killed the punchline again.

Heh heh. Hey! See that red button? I dare you to press it!

"If you're smart, you'll do what I did. Except the exact opposite in every way."

The actual text:

Barack,

I do not doubt for a moment that history will treat me harshly. I can only hope that, in time, posterity will see the cancerous effect that Richard Cheney had on my administration. My cowardice will undoubtedly be a blight upon my legacy, but I would rather be known as a fool and a coward than a despot and lunatic.

You see, I am not a stupid man. However, I do fear the power wielded by my Vice President and his PNAC colleagues. Let it suffice to say that I was told how things were really going to be very early on in the 2000 campaign. The only way to inocculate myself against the horrors which "my" administration would bring to bear on this world was to paint myself as the world's jester.

I have played the fool for these eight years because to play the hero would endanger myself and those that I love. This is my cross to bear. You will find all sorts of evidence if you dig in the right places. Follow the money, Mr. President. I have left as many bread crumbs as I could, but Cheney is a thorough man and you will have you work cut out for you.

All I ask is that, for the safety of my loved ones, you allow history to remember me not as the whistle blower who told you where the the bodies are buried but as the Idiot Child-Emperor: the fool who laid low the American Empire. If that means prosecution for me along with the rest of these animals, then so be it.

It is for the best.

Sincerely,

George W. Bush

P.S. Go White Sox!

StaY aAWy fRom pretZ3ls.

Enjoy the gig. Me & the boys hooked you up with some sweet new executive powers. Don't be afraid to use 'em and abuse 'em!

I stand corrected :-)

How long before we start getting emails from our friends with "scanned copies" of this note, not doubt written in red cryaon on yellow legal paper, with backwards letters and dire warnings about the big red "lunch" button in the top right drawer.

Sigh...however, I'll tell Regans advice visa vi turkey's is still something I carry with me to this day.

(You thought I was going to say "Hussein," didn't you?) John Roberts and I came up with the idea to purposely mess you up on the oath of office. If we pulled it off (and I bet we did!), I don't think you're actually the president, technically. He thinks you are, but I'm the decider. Sorry--couldn't resist it!

Love,

W.

P.S. Cheney is faking it with the wheelchair. (Don't tell anyone I told you.) I told him I didn't think it would win him any sympathy since he looks even more like Mr. Potter that way.

P.P.S. Let freedom reign!

"I am sorry and ashamed . . . (please don't tell anyone)."

Mr. Potter in "It's a wonderful Life"

I ruined the country and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.

Dear Brock:

I votted for you. Dont tell Dick or he'l beat me up agin.

You're bigest fan,

George W. Bush, numb. 43

P.S. I votted for Al G. and J. Kary to!!!

The Letter would say:

Assalamu Alaikum My Brother Barak;

Our plan to establish a world wide Muslim hegemony is well underway.

Iraq is no longer a threat to our Masters in Tehran, and my feigned incompetence has both crippled the great Satan and ensured your election, allowing you to complete the prophecy.

I apologize that the heathens in Afghanistan still plague us via their alliance with Pakistan, but I believe the Devils in India may well take care of them for you shortly.

Soon my brother all will be one in service of Mighty Allah, and the true followers of his only prophet, peace be upon you my brother.

Sincerely,

43

You never suspected they both might be secret muslims now did you?

Dear Black Guy -

After you get settled, we should meet up for some fishing in Houston. Ma says you people like it there.

- W

Enclosed in this letter is a photo of the Kennedy assassination from an angle that nobody in the public has ever seen. They showed me this photo on the first day of my presidency, and then They told me that I had better do what They say, or else.

You'll probably be hearing from Them soon.

--Bush

And here's a map of the Rose Garden, with Barney's favorite "spot" indicated. Might come in handy when training that new puppy.

Resume With Extreme Prejudice

Constant

Cluster Fucks..

Keep up

My overseas

Engendered

Agenda

Operation

Sucks...

Please remember that you were the beneficiary of change from 200 years of hard fought civil rights work,not the cause of the change,americans showed what I knew all along we are a great people.Can the media tell the everybody this recession still isn't as bad as the one #39 left #40 now?Alot of small businesses and homeowners could use that.Go ahead Make MY Day,increase the troops in Afghanistan you'll find out real quick why I suckered those terrorist bastards into Iraq.Need to know about all the torture stuff call Princess Pelosi she was in on it and supported it all.Know what we got in common Barry?Those Clintons and Gores misunderestimated us both heh heh!!!