Just saw the articles in their entirety.

Oh god, my sides hurt.

that Jesus is probably unelectable.

I think Optimus Prime shows the flexibility necessary for rapidly changing world events so he has my vote.

Zombie Abraham Lincoln

Pros: Saved the Union once before. Strong candidate for red states (Kentucky native).

Con: It will be tough to run as a Republican next year.

... willing to run on biodiesel?

We already know he fights bad guys pretty well. If he can do that and be all energy efficient about it at the same time, we're all set.

Also the news would be much more fun overall. Like watching cartoons instead of puppet theater.

ALBERTO GONZALES

Pros: Cleaver writer of Enhanced Interrogation Laws; Available for late hospital visits; Can operate telephone listening devices; Knows Texas DWI laws like the back of his hand

Cons: Forgets a lot

http://danmccoy.blogspot.com/2005/08/bush-beatability.html

I like yours, too.

Timing is everything

Some fundamentalist religious zealots will no doubt be surprised...and very indignant...to see Jesus listed among the DEMOCRATIC candidates. Maybe it would open their eyes to go back and simply read the teachings actually attributed to Jesus in the Gospels.

Jesus is not reported as saying a single word on the subject of homosexuality.

Nowhere does Jesus advocate using the power of the government to control people's behavior and choices with respect to the most personal and intimate areas of their lives, those associated with sexual activity.

And yet, many of those who invoke his name define their "Christianity" primarily on those two issues, as though they were the most important themes of Jesus' ministry.

On the other hand, Jesus was constantly talking about regarding each other as neighbors and helping those who are in need.

The association of the most conservative elements of Christianity with hard core right wing Republican politics is one of the most deplorable developments of the last couple of decades It has had a profoundly harmful effect on the making of our public policies and it has presented a very distorted picture of what Christianity is to those outside the faith.

I suppose this is a rather serious response to what was essentially a humorous political comment, but it's something I feel very strongly about and I couldn't resist.

Pros: Powerful elder god with planet-wide network of crazed worshippers. Lies endlessly dreaming in his stone house in R'lyeh at the bottom of the sea.

Cons: Covered with slimy tentacles. When awakened, will destroy civilization.

... I'll vote for Dick Cheney.

I thought zombie Reagan had already served two terms...

ALBERTO GONZALES

Pro: Can drive the Chuck Wagon.

Con: Can't cook.

On February 1, 2007 Senator Hillary Clinton betrayed we the people of America in her prostituting and pandering address to the American Israel Public Affairs Committee/AIPAC.

Senator Clinton claimed, "Both Israelis and Americans know so well, a democracy is far more than just holding elections. Democracy has to spring from an active and open citizenry dedicated to tolerance, to respect for differences, to the rule of law, to policies that lift us up not tear us down as fellow human beings, and to the value of human life."

Jeff Halper, American Israeli, a 2006 Nobel Peace Prize Nominee, Founder and Coordinator of ICAHD/Israeli Committee Against House Demolitions has consistently affirmed that, "Israel is a not a democracy but is an Ethnocracy, meaning a country run and controlled by a national group with some democratic elements but set up with Jews in control and structured to keep them in control." [Chapter 2, "Memoirs of a Nice Irish-American 'Girl's' Life in Occupied Territory" by eileen fleming]

When Israel became a state in 1948, it was contingent upon upholding the UN Universal Declaration of Human Rights which guarantees in Article 13 that:

(1) Everyone has the right to freedom of movement and residence within the borders of each state.

(2) Everyone has the right to leave any country, including his own, and to return to his country.

Israel encourages any Jew without any pre-existing historical tie to the land to migrate under the Law of Return and all receive immediate citizenship and all rights and privileges including state-financed language and Jewish history immersion, free and subsidized housing, job placement and welfare assistance while seeking employment, medical, dental and other benefits...

More @

http://www.thepeoplesvoice.org/cgi-bin/blogs/voices.php/2007/02/15/p14515

Jesus was never a Christian-the term was NOT coined until three decades after he walked the earth.

Jesus was a social justice radical revolutionary, Palestinian devout Jewish road warrior who rose up/intifada and challenged the job security of the Temple authority by teaching the people they did NOT need to pay for ritual baths or sacrificing livestock to be OK with God; for God loved them just as they were; sinners and outcasts enduring under a brutal occupation.

What got JC crucified was disturbing the status quo of the occupying forces of his time, by claiming Caesar only had power because God allowed it.

e

http://www.wearewideawake.org/

Any body but the complete phony Mrs. Clinton. She hasn't done anything as the carpet bagger senator from New York. So, why should anyone think she would be remotely good as president. It would be a big mistake to put those 2 unindicted criminals back in the White House. I am a New Yorker....