I wandered into our breakroom during "Reverand" Al's speach...I hope I was not the only one who saw the irony of this man praising MJ as a civil rights pioneer, and bringing whites and blacks together...all the while he (Sharpton) has been a pioneer of racial division.

memorials are almost always sad -

And why did you watch - I have no idea?

As one who mourned how the ferociously talented little boy was used and abused by his family, I've been appalled at the hagiography going on. Even our local public radio station felt it had to cover the ceremony live.

So I wouldn't have to. Thanks. Now lets plant him before he starts to smell.

Nice article but I have to quibble over one point. I can't speak about the "record collections of [your] white friends" but AM radio was integrated by black artists long before Michael Jackson came along. I too am Jackson's age and remember well -- before the Jackson 5 came along - the many black Motown (and Atlantic and Chess) artists who were all over AM radio in the 1960's/early '70s right alongside white artists. It was later when radio (FM at that point), unlike many other aspects of life, became more segregated. Give Jackson credit for breaking the race barrier at MTV perhaps, but he most certainly did not integrate AM radio.

Joan,

I've recently become a big fan of your column. I watched the memorial today and i've been struggling myself to put the right perspective on Michael's death and the media coverage.

The problem I have with your post today is that right now, #1 on the 5 things you must know section is Paris' heartfelt words. It's not just CNN that makes this the news of the day and not the Obama speech I watched at 2am this morning (PST).

Not sure where the line of overkill is, but i think we all share keeping the line blurred.

I think what's important about keeping Paris' words at the forefront is it's the most human and normal part of today. A daughter lost her father, not a petafile or a king. We build people up and take them down and in all our need for having a window into someones life, we never look for the things that make them normal.

I can't imagine being Paris, Suri Cruise, or anyone for that matter that has to spend every day of their life less than 2 feet from a man/woman with a camera in their face keeping them from any sense of a normal life. Paris and Brooke Shields were the only normal things happening today on a very abnormal stage.

Hopefully we'll figure this celebrity thing out one of these decades.

Best wishes....

I've been stunned by the genuine outpouring of affection after MJ's death, around the world. It's a little tricky to separate the real grief from the hyperbole, but not impossible I think. (Anything that touches on his mother's sphere of influence is poignant; anything to do with the father's is not.) In the end Jackson was truly a uniter, not a divider. And a 100% American eccentric, warts and all.

The most touching peripheral event today here in L.A. was the pre-dawn march of the Ringling Bros/B&B elephants across downtown to the Staples Center (horses too). Tomorrow the circus opens at the Center, and wouldn't Jackson have been delighted; the animals were all stationed backstage during the memorial. Not sure how much that got covered elsewhere, but what a wonderful grace note to the day - something that would have tickled Michael pink (if he hadn't done so himself).

And telling the Jackson children "wasn't nothing strange about your daddy. It was strange what your daddy had to deal with," well, that's simply not true. You can think Jackson was treated badly -- and I do -- without thinking he did nothing to incite doubt and derision. The three Jackson children are going to have to deal with a lot of their poor late father's strangeness over the course of their life. But then again, nobody tells the whole truth at a funeral.

It was a memorial you , what did you expect? Did you think Rev Al was gonna get up and say, "hey kids, your dad was a weirdo, deal with it". No, obviously you didn't think that because as you said: "But then again, nobody tells the whole truth at a funeral". So you're not stupid enough to realize that people don't diss the dead at memorial services (it wasn't a funeral) they celebrate the dead. So why would you even comment on Sharpton's hyperbole in the first place if you already knew the reason?

What does it take to want to literally be sedated, put under, anesthetized to escape life? I realize as I write that that was a forlorn expectation; Jackson got to the point he did because nobody around wanted to be honest about his life; why would they be honest in death? May Jackson find the peace he never found in life. And may we now return to our regularly scheduled programming.

Newsflash Joan, this was a 50 year old man who was preparing for a gruling set of performances in Europe. This wasn't about "escaping life" this was about stoping pain so he could continue to perform, please take your ameture psycho babble and shove it.

Growing up in the circus may seem grand to someone on the outside but on the inside it usually leads to a loneliness that only other 'circus folk' can understand. MJ was gifted. That gift ultimately destroyed him. Very sad.

Thank you, I agree with much you have said and it needs to be said. Yet, I feel that the entire memorial service should have not happened.

There has been too much smoke and mirrors about this brilliantly talented but depraved man's life. We all love people and things in our childhood that help us along the way on our path to adulthood, but then we must face things as they are when we grow up. MJ never did grow up, never faced his demons. He anethesizied himself, bleached himself white, designed and bought for himself pretty white blond babies, obsessed on self mutilation, slept with young boys who he hurt deeply but he could not admit to it or see it for what it was. And now it appears his fans also cannot or refuse to see Michael as he was. This memorial was an atrocity because it was all about perpetruating his own lie about his childlike pure self, not the true Michael Jackson who was a dark and disturbed man.