When I was sent to Catholic School as a kid, the nuns told us that Jesus was nekkid on the cross, and that the loincloth was just a convention!

Apparently it's OK to show a guy dying by inches from torture with thorns stuck into his scalp by a lynch mob and a spear stuck into his rib cage by a watching soldier just as long as he's dressed. This is sort of like the state's attorney in our town who rushed into action to close a proposed nudie bar, but let a poolroom where four people had been shot over the years stay open. Shooting is OK as long as everybody keeps their clothes on.

Whether he existed, or was divine, are matters of historical record and faith.

But he certainly wasn't the sole aqualine nose, white European male in the Middle east.

That is even harder to believe than the rest of the story.

MC Chocolate Jesus is the moniker just waiting to be taken and ridden to the top of the charts

long as I got my chocolate Jesus, melting on the dashboard of my car.

Why can't we all just get along?

I guess there's no story without conflict. Civilization cannot move forward without a Protagonist and an Antagonist duking it out somewhere.

Just keep your hands off my Peeps, wench, or there's gonna be trouble.

Great post! This story cracks me up. With all that's going on in the world, a chocolate Jesus has this guy up in arms? Oh, man.

And as for commercializing Easter, shouldn't pagans be the ones who're upset at Christians for bogarting their holiday (along with all the other major holidays that were conveniently co-opted around the calendar), instead of Christianists being upset that "their" holiday's been commercialized?

Gee, the Roger Smith is a few blocks from my office--not far from St. Pat's Cathedral. Thanks for the tip; (and thank you Bill) I'll be sure to stop over for a peek.

Outrage over a chocolate Jesus. Is that the best the Donohue can do? He's slowing down. I doubt this will get him a spot on Fox.

As I have neither pride nor shame, I'll go ahead and say it.

First, how did Joan miss the "Catholics - We love to eat our God" angle to this?

As a kid, I'd always first bite off bite the ears from my chocolate easter bunny. Nothing unusual there, I think. Sometimes the entire head, just for effect. Maybe that's what made me gay?

So anyway, with this choclate Jesus, what to eat first? What indeed?

there. I said it. Cheap ad-hominem attack. And it sure felt good.

Since when do we give ANY time to cheap dickheads like Bill Donohue? It's truly sad, what we've come to in this country.

Oddly, it's probably the Internet. In the dim days past, Donohue couldn't get an audience. Now? Interesting, isn't it?

It's difficult to tell from the blurry photo linked from Joan's blog, but I doubt that Jesus is depicted with anatomic correctness since he'll likely be shown as uncircumcised.

And by worship, I mean lick all over until it melts in my mouth.

but this looks like a very lovely piece of art. The muscle detail is really splendid. If someone is in the neighborhood with a digital camera, can you post a larger photo?

When I was in the 7th grade in the dying days of the '60's Sister Anne told us the resurrection never happened. "If you just believe in magic tricks you're missing the point. The resurrection is a symbolic story that tells us Christ's message survives his death." No wiser words were spoken. We were also taught that Jesus was naked when crucified, was middle eastern, the Nativity story was a fable and the miracles were symbols. That was when the Catholics were getting pretty progressive.

I've long ago stopped believing in religion, but that nun was right on target. Its a lesson all these rage and hate-filled and bitter "christians" should take to heart.

Sister Anne we need you!

That reminds me of another thing from Catholic school: one of the nuns told us that when the sacrifical host has been blessed, it *literally* becomes the blood of Jesus. Then she followed up with a story (invented in her head, no doubt) that there was an occasion when a mentally disturbed man took a rifle to a Catholic church and, as the priest was raising the host, fired a shot through it and it dripped human blood in full view of everybody in the church.

After this, whenever I had to attend Communion at the church, do you think this grade-schooler was going to bite down on that thing? Uh-uh!

In fact, what disturbed me the most about Catholic school was the nun's fascination with blood and gore. I was thinking while writing my earlier post about the nuns relishing the details of the crown of thorns on Jesus and the whipping at the post. Yeesh.

The Patriot Act address chocolate Jesus's? How could they have overlooked that possibility of all things?

I am suffering from living here in the Bay Area. Not only have I missed the opportunity to see Christ Crucified in all His Chocolate Charisma, but I now find out that I missed a whole hotel room drenched in melted cheese! Sheesh.

All we get in California is happy cows!

I really love the fact that it's called "My Sweet Lord".

He should have used dark chocolate though. Milk chocolate is so blah.

So Jesus had to be black, huh? Because Jewish men in Israel are black? Because people living in the Middle East now are generally black, right? I'd like to see you tell that to a bunch of Israelies/Jews/Palestinians/Arabs/Persians/Egyptians. I'm sure they'd agree they are black, not white.

Or maybe you're wrong. Jesus was Semitic, which is considered "white" in today's backwards, there-are-only-4-or-5-races mentality. He was most probably a "tanned" "white" Jewish male.

But you believe Urban Legends over fact, of course. Just saying....