I've never seen the essence of parenthood so eloquently depicted. I particularly like the descriptions of the silent joys of parenting. Too often our media and entertainment depicts only the chaos and stress of parenting. When being a parent is also a life long love affair filled with timeless moments.

I particularly like that the piece was written by a man. And must confess that I did not realize this until I got near the bottom.

Aye Gary, when I woke up this morning and read your poignant "parent coming of age' article, I cried. Two weeks ago I packed my first born off to University of California Santa Cruz to go wide angle on the world -- he'll do his own laundry, (much to his chagrin,) maneuver through the abyss that is the UC system, navigate new friendships, make plenty of mistakes, VOTE, and quite possibly, fall in love. I suppose I'm lucky to be an old hippy of sorts; I've been aware of the bitter sweetness of the passage of time, (as he's grown from 21" to 6'4") and have cherished all of the transformations you so aptly described. But it's this ceremonial occasion that's truly taken my breath away, watching my son spread his wings on his own. Thanks for reminding me to log this 'first day of school' in the scrapbook of my heart where it belongs!

(I guess I'm at the stage where I should recycle his Power Ranger lunch box, gift it to the little kid with no front teeth down the street, but that's gonna be tough..)

I

The Columbus statue in Boston got smeared with red paint again. They should use real blood next time.

Cut it out.

I'm a menopausal parent of an 8 year old. I am mortified at the amount of crying I do these days. I just watched the Who documentary "The Kids Are Alright" and burst into tears at the sight of impossibly young Roger Daltrey, baby-faced Keith Moon, Pete Townshend without sunken eyes and John Entwhistle before the beard. How could it have been 40 years ago? How can Moon have so deteriorated in a scant 10 years, and be dead now for almost 30 years?

And now this essay. Are you trying to kill me? I'm not even at the pre-teen years and I am seeing the past in flashes already when I glimpse a dad who picks up a four year old who comes running at him with a face-splitting happy-grin. I turn my head instinctively when I hear a small voice call "Mommy!" in the supermarket. I get so teary when I hear about how they change overnight and become these people who can't remember a time when they'd never dream of crossing the street without holding your hand.

Don't even get me started about hearing John Lennon singing "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans" to his boy.

Wow, what an interesting article that describes something I'll never be able to relate to, being childless and all--guess I should just stick my head in the oven.

Parents truly get an extra dimension to their lives that non-parents don't; just as new lovers do, in their own way.

(Jason, what is YOUR day-job? Does the trust fund dry up if you ever leave grad school?)

Thank you Marcie, you are right, it isn't just for parents.

In fact, (don’t take this the wrong way readers), but why is it so often assumed that the only way we can ever understand the elusiveness of time and the beauty of life is through having children? That really bugs me... kind of like when republicans talk about "family values".

I am sure that parents throughout the world share these feelings and it is truly a beautiful thing. I’m just going to say right here and now, that living “in the moment” is not exclusive to parents. I firmly believe that anyone who is a compassionate person becomes aware of the changes going on in his own life and the lives of those around him. Having compassion for other people (or even ducks) is how we live in the moment. To care about another to the point where you would gladly sacrifice your own well being for the good of someone else IS living in the moment. Everything that has ever happened, and everything that will happen are always contained in this moment… but without love and compassion for ourselves and others, we miss it.

Compassion doesn’t come easy, but to a parent life without it is not even an option. Speaking as a person with no children, I’m just saying, life is still beautiful, as long as you can be of service to other people.

As a child (who is 26 now) who has lost her dad last March, reading this was a poignant reminder of also not wasting the moments... It isn't just for parents. Sometimes, teenagers and the ever-invincible 20-somethings need to remember that time is precious, too. Or someday you will wake up and it will be gone.

Isn't that like a national day of liberal guilt and genocidal mourning?

nom

The subject says it all. Bee-yoo-ti-fall

Gary Kamiya has beautifully captured the essence of this very poignant experience of parents. It's something I've never quite been able to articulate, especially to people who don't have children. These moments make parenthood so rich and people on the outside looking in don't realize how profound and amazing it is. Thanks so much Mr. Kamiya! I will save and treasure this piece and, hopefully, hand it to my son (now 14) some day when he has children of his own. Thank you.

Wow, an essay for adults. (Not now, honey, Daddy is writing) I was a little worried we were headed towards "Chicken Soup for the Soul," (I'll be there in a minute) but Gary pulls off the sort of writing that is always rewarding: a fresh look at an old theme, (It's just something I'm writing for the people on the computer) and here we have mortality and parenthood. (I'll be done faster if you just let me do this!) I don't know what Jason's problem is. I give Gary all sorts of props for a phrase like: "Kids are an extremely irritating miracle." (I said "Just a minute!") Also, the Proust references (Why are you crying?) Gotta go.