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I am sure that you would be a prime candidate for that prestigious award if you would (a) show up here more often, and (b) reply to the question I asked you a couple of years ago in a private e-mail. You may comply with (b) privately.
Sir, I am an excellent correspondent, and if I failed to answer some question or other, it was the merest oversight. Resend to new email address: monaholland@att.net.
I trust this will end all suggested stains on my character or reasons for eschewing those painful fishnet hose.