Letters to the Editor
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The Pachydermolition IS fun, but for gut-busting funny, read Hunter@Kos
...which Glenn linked to in his update. It's a howlingly hilarious parody of a Sunday morning talk show, with an earnest newscaster trying valiantly to steer the discussion to serious issues (explicit Presidential endorsement of torture, McCain's repeated lies linking al Qaeda & Iran, McCain's "100 years in Iraq" quote etc., ) while 3 Serious Pundits repeatedly interrupt with Awesome Breaking News Stories: Elitist Obama Orders Orange Juice!!!, Out-of-touch Obama Can't Bowl!!! Blundering Obama Claims Workers 'Bitter' Over Job Losses!!!
Here's an excerpt:
PUNDIT 2: This is just staggering...Just devastating to the Obama campaign. You have a regular guy like John McCain, who's really in touch with these haldbreed nine-fingered dirt pickers, who really feels their pain at their telecommunications companies having to answer to federal laws, or who are really, really alarmed that the Iraq War won't be allowed to continue indefinitely, or who just want to do their patriotic part for encouraging free trade by outsourcing their town's jobs and industries, and then you've got Obama over here claiming they're "bitter"? Wow. I mean you have to marvel at the blunder...
PUNDIT 3: I agree. This really helps McCain. For Obama to claim these cowpie chuckers are bitter, or that these people who have been losing jobs are losing hope - well that's just the gravest of elitist insults to these flyover country half-human Sears-shopping trailer park squatters. How dare he insult them by calling them "bitter"? You know, in my last column I wrote about these fine small town possum scrapers, and how valuable they are to the country...I'm not sure Obama can really relate to something like that. He's certainly never written a column about it...
PUNDIT 1: Probably to busy drinking orange juice! Ha! But seriously, I agree with your agreement with me. I mean, between wanting orange juice, doing badly at sport, and claiming people who've lost their jobs are bitter, I'm just not sure what demographic he's still trying to appeal to! Certainly not the roadkill-for-dinner folks that make up our small towns...They don't care about complicated things like torture, wars & job flight, they care about coffee and bowling and leaders who understand how much they like wars and job flight. And laundromats...
It's absolutely savage and one of the funniest things I've read in weeks. Highly recommended.
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Elephantman and the 1 percenters
I've wondered at times why elephantman and a few others keep posting here, as if we all don't know exactly what they're going to say about anything that comes up. I thought one possibility to explain their continued willingness to make fools of themselves was that after each new revelation of corruption and incompetence they were under the impression we might think they would join the vast majority of America that has come to the conclusion something is very wrong with this administration, and they just wanted to make sure we all know they they're still loyal to Bush.
I realize now it goes even deeper than that. They don't just want us to know that they're part of that small and ever shrinking minority that still thinks Bush is doing a fine job. They aspire to much greater depths. They want to make clear they are part of that really tiny portion of true believers whose loyalty is of the utterly blindly partisan kind. They are the 1 Percenters!, who will spout the party line no matter what comes out, and attack those who have come to realize this administration is the singularly most inept bunch of imbecilic villains in America's history, even when that ends up being over 99% of us. They want to make clear that their loyalty has nothing whatsoever to do with facts and realities, but is based on the sheer willpower it takes to ignore reality and stay true to a cult of absolute worship regardless of what everybody else thinks about them.
Just look how far elephantman will go to make sure we know his loyalty isn't based on anything remotely resembling reality. Tonight he tries to make it sound like there's somebody somewhere who thinks that for Lyndie England to have been following the chain of command that started at the top (and came down through Yoo and through the chain of command to the soldiers at the bottom), that the soldiers themselves would have needed to have read the Yoo memo, or that Yoo himself would have needed to have given orders to them. Obviously even heffalump knows how ridiculous that is, but he wants to make clear his loyalty doesn't hinge on things like caring whether he looks like a complete idiot in front of the vast majority of Americans who think he is one.
Elephantman, shooter, nozzlebuffer and the rest are One Percenter! And they won't let us ever forget it.
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DanJoaquinOz
i know what you mean. i read that thing and laughed so hard i about choked on my tongue.
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I'm sorry i was so rude Elephantman
I've gotten into a habit of talking about you in the 3rd person like you're not even there, and I realize now how rude that is. Let me restate what I just said, but address you like you're actually a real person.
I've wondered at times why you and a few others keep posting here, as if we all don't know exactly what you're going to say about anything that comes up. I thought one possibility to explain your continued willingness to make a fool of yourself was that after each new revelation of corruption and incompetence you were under the impression we might think you would join the vast majority of America that has come to the conclusion something is very wrong with this administration, and you just wanted to make sure we all know they you're still loyal to Bush.
I realize now it goes even deeper than that. You don't just want us to know that you're part of that small and ever shrinking minority that still thinks Bush is doing a fine job. You aspire to much greater depths. You want to make clear you are part of that really tiny portion of true believers whose loyalty is of the utterly blindly partisan kind. You are one of the 1 Percenters! You will spout the party line no matter what comes out, and attack those who have come to realize this administration is the singularly most inept bunch of imbecilic villains in America's history, even when that ends up being over 99% of us. You want to make clear that your loyalty has nothing whatsoever to do with facts and realities, but is based on the sheer willpower it takes to ignore reality and stay true to a cult of absolute worship regardless of what everybody else thinks about you.
Just look how far you will go to make sure we know your loyalty isn't based on anything remotely resembling reality. Tonight you try to make it sound like there's somebody somewhere who thinks that for Lyndie England to have been following the chain of command that started at the top (and came down through Yoo and through the chain of command to the soldiers at the bottom), that the soldiers themselves would have needed to have read the Yoo memo, or that Yoo himself would have needed to have given orders to them. Obviously even you know how ridiculous that is, but you want to make clear your loyalty doesn't hinge on things like caring whether you look like a complete idiot in front of the vast majority of Americans who think you are one.
You, shooter, nozzlebuffer and the rest are One Percenter! And obviously you won't let us ever forget it.