Letters to the Editor
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where? advice please.
My dog lay on the floor and would not stand up. The creature cried and farted. I felt sorry for the animal.
"Dog," I said, "what is the matter?"
"I am sad."
"Can I help?"
"Yes. Tell me where I can read something interesting and smart and feeling and diverse because all you give me is the New York Times, and Washington Post, and Los Angeles Times, and Wall Street Journal, and Time Magazine, and Newsweek, and CNN, and ABCCBSNBC, and I shall die of it soon. I am dying of it already."
"What, Dog, do you want to read?"
"It doesn't exist. I'm sure it doesn't. Forget about it. I'm sorry I asked."
"What doesn't exist?"
"Nothing."
"What?"
"Alright -- and don't say it because I already know how stupid this is and I'm just a dog so don't be mean."
"No."
"Where can I read a conversation of letters with intelligence and erudition and passion and restraint? Where can I find a discussion with voices so spirited and reasoned (and loco) as Greenwald and Scientician and D.C. Law1 and mr. beepop-0 and Sysprog and L.W.M. all in one place? Where does Karen M. ask questions? Where are links posted to all sorts of interesting blogs and articles? Do you know of such a place?"
"No, that's not possible. No such place exists. You are having a dog dream. But it's a good one. Dream on, Dog. Dream on."