Regional personalities are a collective mystery. States are often said to have their own personalities - to correspond, I suppose, with the nicknames we give state residents. Some of these terms have outlasted others. Sooners, Buckeyes and Hoosiers are better known than the moniker for folks from my home state of Illinois: Suckers.

Years ago, I was visiting one of my fellow Suckers who had gone off to college up north, and he schooled me on the personality traits commonly observed from his new perspective as a Minnesotan. He said people from Illinois were loud, rude and above, all, cynical.

I was surprised. Never thought of myself as cynical. And I have no idea if Illinoisian cynicism has its roots in our ignominius moniker. Or maybe it's because our state has elected such an embarrassing governor.

From Houston to the eatern line with Louisiana, from Houston through Dallas to Oklahoma, that's SOuth. Thew western part (across the rolling flat land going to San Antonion and Austin) is West. It makes a difference.

There are different Souths, with different geographic, cultural and generational custom. In Atlanta, depending on where you are, You won't get a "sugar". Mississippi is a culture unto itself. Within this, different people are different. Class is the real divider now.

But really, sometimes the nosy questions at home really are just to judge. I'm from Louisiana, and when meeting other people from there, I still get the "who ya people, who ya mama" questions. That's part of the reason I'm in the Midwest. I can live without the clannishness based on class.

In the north, segregationa on race and class exists. It's more undercover. In the South, you have a faction that is very in-your-face about it. You also have a hug you to stab you faction.

Then again, there's idiots in every region. Why should the South be different?

I had the misfortune of living in the South for a number of years and my only contention with Mr. Keillor's article is the assumption that saying "darling" and "honey" and making small talk with strangers makes you kind. My parents are both immigrants, with accents. Though they speak English perfectly well (mind you, with much better grammar and diction than most Southerners), as soon as either opens their mouth, you can see the change on the face of the listener. Many a person has made incredibly disparaging remarks to them, including, but certainly not limited to: "What the hell are you saying?" "Can you please speak in English?". Some have also called over co-workers and said: "Can you understand what he/she is saying?"...probably, just to, you know, amplify the humiliation a little. My personal favourite is when someone my mother is speaking to completely ignores her and turns to me to figure out what the issue is.

Just because they put up some sort of syrupy personna of kindness, does not make them kind, tolerant or good people. This is akin to the theory that just because you spend hours at chuch on Sunday, you are not necessarily a moral or just human.

So, Mr. Keillor, I would venture to suggest that the reason Southern people vote for these ridiculous politicians is that they mirror the REAL South: not nice, kind, generous or helpful, but mostly shallow, anti-illectual, racist and homophobic.

Argue with me all you want, I was there, I lived it, I have absolutely not one kind thing to say about the South.

This was a new twist on Northern Liberal patronizing. Kill'em with kindness...

Well, maybe that's not an entirely new twist.

Anyway, I don't think that it was Richard Nixon's 'Southern Strategy' or any 'New South' Republican incomeptence that left the people of New Orleans in a state of anarchy after a recent bad storm. The New South Republicans across the border to the east in Missisppi did okay, as did the Republican Texans over to the west.

Bad government, Garrison? What about some of our favorite Democrats who goverened Alabama and Mississippi and Louisiana and Georgia from about 1885 to about 1985? Were those the southerners who better understood good govenrment?

and most letters just went on about the folksiness of southern hospitality.

well, the answer to the Q is that under the pleasantries- they are not very well educated and to put it bluntly, a bit stupid.

ok? like that answer?

southerners don't have a clue, and thus caused Bush to be elected. if you think Bush is dumb, then face the fact that the people who voted for him must be even dumber than he is, since they fell for his line of BS.

iedal said: "well, the answer to the Q is that under the pleasantries- they are not very well educated and to put it bluntly, a bit stupid."

I was born in Texas and I've lived all over the south. I must conclude thet you're right about southerners. The poorest schools are in the south, southern culture actively disparages intelligence, too many people go to megachurchs for their entertainment instead of reading a damn book (Bill o'Reilly doesn't count) every now and again, and they actually like watching cars go around in circles for 4 hours.

The really pernicious folk, including Dubya and DeLay, have their roots in Texas. Take some solace though-- the great karmic anvil is headed their way in the form of Mexican immigrants. Conservative heads explode when they hear a language other than english, but these people are the future of the south and they're about to turn Dallas County blue. :)

You really do need somebody to pick on, don't you, sugar.

I remember when you could barely write a column witout slamming Unitarians, most of whom would respect you without mockery.

And a while back you did another shootin'-huntin' Stupid Bubba sendup.

It bugs me because you're so talented. I think you're withering under the global horrors of war and neocons and genocide. I don't blame you, you are a sensitive human being. It's a hard thing to keep your irony sharp when you're horrified.

But meanwhile, sit up straight and mind your manners, you hear me? Stop making these cliched generalizations and poking your fingers in people's bruises. Those who voted for the wrong people are seeing their faces in the pond right now, there's no need to stir it up.

You'll catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, you know.

I have never known deeper graciousness than among the black elderly in the South. I'm glad you met a sweet woman who loves the children and patted your knee.

If you want to help voters in the South, how about taking your money and your skills down there and giving some of these weary folks a ride to the polls?

It's easy to take potshots from your limo.