Don't both Sean Connery and Billy Connolly have Irish ancestry?

Alan Black has claimed that he was never good at being Scottish. More to the point, if you ever want to hear from him again that is,how is he doing showing his allegiance to the regime in his new home. Does he ever make the mistake of bending his knees when he walks? Does he loudly and proudly demand fascist fries with his greasy hamburger, thereby distancing himself from the French and their values of liberty, equality and fraternity, none of which are particularly popular in Washington these days. Remember too, that if the English were the 'auld enemy', the French were the 'auld alliance'. To the powers that be in Mr. Black's new home, that is enough to kindle massive distrust. How often does Alan Black go to sleep at night worrying if he will wake up in Jordan, or some other pliant democratic despotic country.

Too bad Alan, if Scotland is the worst country in Europe to live, your alternative may not be the worst in the world but it is certainly the most evil.

My condolences

Bill Greaves

Two words: Kevin McKidd.

>What Star Trek lacked was an English character

Oh, um... (embarrassed to know this, but)...

Mr. Kyle was the English Star Trek character. He was the blond transporter operator who stepped in and worked the controls when Mr. Scott was the one getting transported up. In the one where Spock has a beard, he terrorizes the parallel-universe Mr. Kyle with threats of torture--though Mr. Kyle was so effeminate, I don't think he'd have lasted in the mean parallel universe anyway.

Andrew Carnegie, philanthropist? Please! He was the original robber-baron, whose workers lived in the most miserable conditions imaginable while making him rich beyond belief. His 'philanthropy' apparently did not extend to the people he so willingly exploited - which makes sense, given that the whole enterprise was his method of simultaneously assuaging his guilt and ensuring his immortality. And btw, I am Scottish born and bred, and grew up 12 miles from his birthplace - he was always held up in school as some kind of role-model, something which even a twelve year-old could see through.

There are Scots we can and should be proud of - Watt, Bell, Logie-Baird, Fleming, Burns - even Adam Smith. Carnegie is not one of them.

All of us tall freckled reddish blonde Scots applaud you and your letter. Both my husband and I, being American have always known that we had something in common. We found out what it was when we visited Scotland two years ago. We found that we both had Scottish ancestors. His were named Chambers and Davidson and mine were named Bell and Davidson. We also found that we liked Scotland better than anyplace we had ever been and would move there in a minute except we'd miss our American Grandchildren. And I totally agree with you. Roger Moore is a no talent fop and it is an insult that he was given the role that had been ably played by the rugged good looking Scot, Sean Connery.

I'm from Scotland, and I live in the San Francisco Bay Area.

And that means I get aksed one question all the time.

And that question is, of course,"are you, perhaps, Irish?"

To which I say, "no I'm not but... I appreciate your concern."

It's been years now since i lived in Scotland, where I was never particularly good at being Scottish. Couldn't play football. Couldn't muster much enthusiasm for the sectarian rifts of Celtic Vs. Rangers. Could tell you that we hated the English, but probably not so much why.

The Scotland I remember is warm-hearted and humorous, and proud to be not-all-that racist (anything to cast the notoriously thug-like English football patriots in a poor light) and happy to make snap decisions based on such subtle distinctions as, "are you a Catholic or a Prodestant?" Because, well, just because...

Compared to the rich social strata of American high school life (or at least, what we saw of it on TV), high school in Scotland had a very flattened class structure - you conformed, you fit in, and you kept your mouth shut.

I was never particularly good at being Scottish, in that way.

Growing up in Scotland was bright and colorful and full of raised voices and singing and joy - at least when your parents and their friends were hosting drunken, bawdy parties in boxy suburban semis.

Or listening to your parents Billy Connolly records with the headphones on.

The rest of the time?

Grey. Concrete. Not exactly welcoming of diversity or even the mildest meander from the expected norm.

My first trip to America was like walking from black and white into color.

It's easy to be nostalgic for black and white movies but I don't know that I'd want to live there.

Bond and Braveheart aside, who were our role models on the international stage?

Scotty from Star Trek (played by a Canadian) and Groundskeeper Willie (celluloid, played by the bass player from Spinal Tap). And Euan McGregor, I suppose, doing the same accent in everything.

What Star Trek lacked was an English character, Lt. Jeeves, say, for Scottie to harbour resentment towards.

Sometimes I feel guilty, just a little, when I get cornered by someone at a party who wants me to be all haggis, and kilts, and bagpipes, and golf and whisky.

Because I'm not.

But I hate to disappoint people.

So I pull out this big, Braveheart sword.

And I stab him... and I stab him...

And I say "Eat my freedom!"

And I stab him.

Then I shoot up some heroin, and nod out.

That way no one is dissapointed.

All cultural stereotypes have been addressed.

It's true though... I don't recall drinking a lot of single malts in some Church car park on some rainy night in August, in my teenage years. Just beer every bit as pissy, yellow and gassy as Bud or MGD.

I've never been to the Highlands, and on two week's worth of vacation time a year, don't think I'll be going any time soon.

And I don't play golf.

Or support Celtic. Or Rangers.

I was never really very good at being Scottish when I lived there.

But now, every time I open my mouth, after we've cleared up the notion that I might be Irish, being Scottish a big part of how people define me.

And a big part of how I think.

And definately more a blessing than a curse.