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• Monday, January 5, 2009 08:55 AM

  minvan bigotry

  I am perpetually baffled by the profound minivan bigotry displayed by males of the species... "it's a girl car" "I can't drive a minivan!"

  It's as if you'd asked them to parade naked down Rodeo Drive at noon on a sunny Saturday.

  Totally stupid, is what it is. Minivans are better than SUVs for EVERY, SINGLE use to which SUVs are put, except one. Offroading.

  And how many SUVs are taken off-road, or used regularly in snow or mud or on steep gravel inclines? Practically none, that's how many.

  why a person would buy an SUV instead of a minivan is not far to seek: guys who drive minivans are simply worried about the size of their dicks. They want to feel like they're driving a macho car, and many SUVs (esp. GM products), are designed to be oversized-gas-guzzling monsters to assuage the neuroses of millions of men who worry about their dick-size.

  Driving a minivan is impossible for these men. Even though a minivan makes more sense than an SUV at just about any point.

  Minivans handle better. They hold LOTS more stuff, and more people. A good minivan handles as well as a quality japanese sedan and has plenty of power.

  SUVs are useless compared to a minivan.

  It's all about the dick-size. Or, in the case of women, it's all about their worries about their driving skills. Or vanity. Vanity infects both genders when it comes to the minivan/SUV divide.

  Pathetic. Why anyone would drive an SUV when you could drive a minivan instead...if you REALLY have stuff or people to haul regularly, is beyond me.

  Now, if you don't haul stuff, and you still buy an SUV, that's just pure neurosis at work.

  —had_enough Read had_enough's other letters
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