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Your rationalizations for not considering a minivan dont work, you just can't deal with the image "problem". Image is the reason most people by the large SUVs in the first place, there is little logic involved in the purchase decision. If you aren't towing you don't need a large SUV.
We have had two long wheelbase Dodge minivans since 1987 and have driven them all over the east coast and into eastern Canada. 7 passngers, 22-24 MPG, huge interor volume, comfortable (and very reliable, lucky for us...).
If you really need the interor space, dont need to tow anything much, and you want the best combination of space and efficiency, the minivan is the only choice.
