Letters to the Editor

When vice presidents shoot people Talking points and protocol tips from the White House Press Office. By Cary Tennis [2006-02-14]

• I knew this was coming...

  But I did not expect it to be in the form of attempted humor. Now, understand that I enjoy funny stuff as much as the next redneck (Animal House, Monty Python, Will Farrell [sometimes], Jon Stewart, etc), but I just did not find this humorous, probably because I dislike all politicians equally, and because it is clear the writer has no experience in the topic. I think Cary's columns are funnier than this. I suppose one reason I find it un-funny, is because so much as been made of it. White House reporters repeatedly (ad nauseam) asking subtle questions like "DO YOU MEAN TO TELL US THAT THE VICE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, DICK (RICHARD) CHENEY, PULLED THE TRIGGER ON A DEADLY WEAPON AND SHOT A POOR INNOCENT FELLOW HUMAN IN THE FACE? HE WAS 'THE SHOOTER'?".

  I mean, for you candy butts that have never been hunting, or have never shot a weapon, here's some news: IT HAPPENS, IT AIN'T NEWS! Perhaps, on a local level only. If it was national news, there would be plenty to write about, come hunting season.

  Here's the other thing that irritates me: writing on topics about which you are clueless, and not fact checking, to whit: "What's a little buckshot in the face?" A little "buckshot" to the face would render one faceless! Buckshot is about as big around as your pinky, and is designed to kill... BUCKS! (as in deer, or other large game). Chaney shooting someone in the face with "buckshot" would have certainly been news.

  Birdshot (as Cary so clearly points out, they were hunting quail), for hunting quail is less than the diameter of a common BB (if you don't know what a BB looks like, stop reading and go polish your Birkenstocks), and is designed to kill a small bird, and not destroy it in the process. Its effective range is about 25 yards.

  Since I am an excellent judge of what is funny for humor's sake, and this is clearly not very humorous, I think the reason that some of you have enjoyed this so much, is that you actually delight in the idea of someone in the political party that you oppose shooting someone else in the face. You are laughing at his pain. How sad is that?

  Poco

  P.S. I am not a republican. I am not a democrat. I am a conservative. Not a lying, cheating, thieving "conservative", a real conservative.

  -- Poco
  [Read Poco's other letters]
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