Letters to the Editor
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So, _That's_ What It Was...
I pass by a Cold Stone Creamery every time I'm at one of our local malls. I've come close to getting something from there twice, and even tried a sample, but there's just something about the look of the ice cream and the overall selections/concept that turned me off. Thanks to this article's author for nailing what it was.
>The company specifically targets 25- to 34-year-old women who diet intermittently, have the money to treat themselves, and are fully invested in the idea that super-rich ice cream is the sort of decadent reward that they deserve. It doesn't matter if the ice cream tastes good, it just has to be naughty -- and what's naughtier than a big bowl of Mud Pie Mojo ice cream?<
Well, that's wonderfully-condescending of them. I rarely buy ice cream out, and it has to be darn good for me to spend the loot (and risk the calories.) And I'd argue that CCC aims at families, as well. The one I've been to is always been packed with parents and kids, and their selections are the kind of double-plus-more-Wonka-combinations children dream of...
> a concoction called Better Batter Cake Carnival (cake batter ice cream, Twix bars, cookies and fudge); both were unfinishable.<
Ugh. Proof that too much of a good thing can be too much.
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Perhaps the Market will work its magic on these chains
There was a Coldstone Creamery just down the street from where I live. I went there once, and can vouch for everything Mr. Peters has to say about the experience. Plus, CC didn't even sell beverages! No Diet Coke to help wash down your gloppy humongous! Not even a bottled water or Dr. Pepper or 100% juice, in case you wanted to accompany someone who did want to get ice cream.
The Coldstone Creamery is now gone, replaced by a Ben & Jerry's.
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I'll have the usual
...businesses that make millions selling sugary and expensive blended coffee drinks that cater to the infantile taste buds of a nation raised on ketchup and Dr. Pepper
It's hard to publish an article on Salon without taking a swipe or two at the United States and Americans, isn't it? I bet this author just wouldn't feel right without a backhand swipe against the great unwashed star-spangled masses, incapable of discerning their own good, and in thrall to crass commercialism. He must feel fortunate to know better. Thank goodness for his noblesse oblige.
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And if a chain can't do basic vanilla right...
...that's a sure sign they aren't gonna hit it right with the fancier combinations.
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the mother of mix-ins
The much beloved Amy's Ice Cream of Austin, Texas does this right. Amy has the innovative flavors with the artery-clogging butterfat percentage and the perky staff, but offers, rather than insists upon, the mix-ins. The best thing about Amy's, though, is the teeny-tiny portions. I believe an Amy's "Tiny" size is 3 ounces, which saves the consumer from volume-induced lethargy and sugarshock. That's how you do it, kids -- and how you become an institution rather than a cute fad.
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The problem, Larceny, is America IS a toilet
Full of chest-thumping retards who think they're the greatest thing in the history of humanity, rather than the self-involved brats caught up in their own unthinking cravings for the next thing being advertized on the teevee with no thought for the consequences of their actions. Owning and eating everything on earth has given Americans the impression that they're somehow special, when the only thing that's special about them is their capacity for destruction and exploitation.
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this sounds familiar....
My first job after graduating college in Boston: Herrell's. Allston, MA. It was 1990. We did the "mix-ins" (or maybe it was "smoosh-ins"--there was a breakdown between Steve Herrell and "Steve's" and "Herrell's", so they had to change the name at the franchise I worked in).
I can say this: their banana ice cream was really good. I gained, like, 15 lbs that summer. And I developed tendonitis from all that mxing. But I can say for certain that these mix-ins didn't just magically appear several years ago.
Maybe if mix-ins were featured on mtv, this would have been a phenomenon what we saw in the early 90s.
So, mix-ins might last. In the cornfed states (of which I am a resident), they could have a go. I do live in the state that pioneered the "fried cheese curd", after all. mmmm. Fried cheese curd....
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Oy, the bigotry and hasty generalizations are killin' me
"It is generally easy to guess at an ice cream chain's target demographic. Ben and Jerry's is for lapsed liberals who support the rain forest by eating ice cream. Häagen-Dazs is for aspiring Eurotrash. Baskin-Robbins is for families that drive minivans. Dairy Queen is for families that drive conversion vans. But mix-in ice cream? Type "Cold Stone" or "Maggie Moo's" into the search field of any online foodie message board and you'll find a wealth of bad reviews and nasty comments. Bad ice cream, overhyped presentation, high prices. Who, besides 7-year-olds, actually likes this stuff?"
I happen to enjoy ice cream at all of those places except Maggie Moo's (never heard of it). So, that makes me a 7-year-old, lapsed liberal who drives a minivan and a conversion van -and aspires to be Eurotrash.
It's all just ice cream, Mr. Peters, no use for the bigotry and the illogic. But then again, rants do raise rantings in our overcrowded online commentary world.
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Amy's Ice Cream
Beloved Amy's Ice Cream of Austin (and Houston) stands head and shoulders above the rest for one reason: mix-ins or no, Amy's ice cream is actually amazing all by itself.
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Disagree on one point
The author obviously loves ice cream and knows his product. Cold Stone ice cream has the texture of marshmallows and the taste of artifical flavors.d Plus the calorie content is way too high - it makes Haagen Daz look like dieter's food. I disagree, though, about Marble Slab. The ice cream is rich, flavorful, and reminds me what Howard Johnson's ice cream used to taste like.
Nothing beats vanilla at the Dairy Queen if you want to eat ice cream everyday. Its flavorful enough, goes down smooth, and won't cause a heart attack. I'm waiting for Howard Johnson's ice cream to return to the stores as it has been promised.
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Ugh
I've been to Coldstone exactly twice. The first time I ate all my ice cream and felt like exploding, and I didn't understand the singing at all. The second time I vowed never to go back when I realized why all the singing--I'd pay them NOT to sing. My friend's order wasn't correct because the person smooshing the ice cream couldn't hear him over it.
It really wasn't that good, either.