I was working at my son's co-op preschool the other day, and preparing strawberries for their snack. The kids are all 5-6 years old.

I was washing the strawberries and slicing off the stem end with a knife, then placing the strawberries in a bowl.

The teacher came up and looked at the strawberries. "You'll need to quarter those".

"Quarter them? But then they'll be messy and slippery and hard to pick up, and all the juice will run out. This way they can hold the strawberry and take bites."

"It's a choking hazard. Some kids might not know what to do and just put the whole thing in their mouths."

WTF??? What FIVE YEAR OLD doesn't know how to EAT? As in, take a bite of solid food, chew it, and swallow it without choking? I could see if this were a class of one-year olds, maybe even two year olds, but these kids are ready for kindergarten and you are afraid to give them a strawberry that's not cut into minute pieces, for fear that they won't know how to EAT IT?

Good grief. Stuff like that really makes me worry about the next generation.

My parents, back in the 1970s and 1980s, let us play all day long around the neighborhood. We had to "check in" every so often, but the only time we really had to be home was dinnertime. This wasn't in some rural paradise, but in suburban California and Florida. I clearly remember being 5 years old and riding my brand-new 10-speed around my Fresno neighborhood with my friends for hours, with no adults in attendance.

When I was about 10 years old, my parents routinely let me take my little sailboat out into the Gulf of Mexico to go fishing. Yep, by myself. I didn't even have a friend along. Sometimes the wind would change direction, and I couldn't get back to land for hours.

There were sharks, big barracudas, storms, and strong currents. I had some pretty close calls (once I had to jump overboard and swim-tow my boat back to shore by tying the bow rope around my waist, another time I literally bumped into a large nurse shark while snorkeling in the channel), but I took it in stride. I learned how to handle myself and stay calm in stressful and dangerous situations. I learned how to RELY ON MYSELF, which has been so immensely helpful, I can't even begin to tell you.

These days I'm the mother of two small children, ages 2 and 5. You wouldn't believe the flak I get for "neglecting" my children and being an "irresponsible mother". The things I do that qualify me for these tags are:

1) Letting the kids play in the front yard while working in the kitchen (which overlooks the front yard). Apparently I am supposed to be outside directly supervising their every move, perhaps brandishing a weapon to fight off the rapists and kidnappers lurking nearby. (NOT, we live in a safe suburban neighborhood).

2) Letting the kids play in the BACK yard by themselves. I can't figure this one out, but maybe they might decide to take a sharp implement and stab themselves with it for some unknown reason if I'm not standing right there? Hmmm, typically they prefer to kick soccer balls and play in the sandbox.

3) Leaving the kids in the car while I walk 25 feet away to the ATM to get cash, in plain sight. No joke, I've had at least 5 people come up and tell me that I'm endangering my children and they could be kidnapped or die of heatstroke. For 3 minutes? While I'm less than 25 feet away? In winter? WTF?

4) Allowing my 5yo to walk two doors down to the neighbor's house to play with their kids. NO ONE DOES THIS! If today's kids go out of the yard for any reason, parents must go too. Huh, he knows about cars, and he knows to stay on the sidewalk. He won't get LOST. I don't get it.

5) Allowing them to use tools, scissors, and cut with knives under supervision. Well, how else are they supposed to learn to learn? A five year old can't learn to use a knife?

6) Taking them on adventures by myself, without an adult male in attendance. Not adventures like say, disarming a terrorist cell, but pretty tame stuff like hiking and camping. "You took your kids hiking in the forest all by yourself?" Um, yeah?

I recently took both kids on a 2 week road trip to AZ from Northern CA, over the Sierras and through the desert, then back, staying in hotels and also camping. My husband didn't come, as he couldn't get the time off from work, and also, he doesn't like camping. Yes, we were in very isolated areas, far from civilization. So? I was well-prepared.

Nothing even remotely weird or scary happened. We saw a lot of incredibly gorgeous landscapes. We visited several hot springs. We saw stars at night, and birds in the morning. The kids had a great time and so did I, although it was a lot of work for one mom, packing them and their stuff up just about every day. Still, it beat staying home by a LONG shot.

I am still trying to raise my kids to be capable, independent little people, in spite of a slight fear that Child Protective Services will someday show up on my doorstep for those naps that my 2yo takes in the car after we get home from an outing... in the driveway, in his carseat, under a shady carport, with the windows open and a baby monitor tucked into the back hatch. Sigh.

I do worry that all of the activities open to my kids are things that I have to sign up for, pay for, and attend with them, like swimming lessons or T-ball. There is no neighborhood group of mixed-age kids roaming around, riding bikes. There is no neighborhood group of kids at all. The only time the kids get together is when the parents do, and of course, with our busy schedules, that only happens every few weeks.

In fact, of all the neighborhood kids (there are 12 boys on our street alone), my kid is the only one who knows how to ride a bike with any skill. We're talking 4-8 year olds! Even my 2yo rides a balance bike around very competently. At least my boys have each other. None of the other kids in our neighborhood are allowed out of their house by themselves.

I think about the days I spent fishing and swimming and riding around the neighborhood exploring with friends or by myself for hours at a time, every day and it makes me sad. My kids haven't had any experiences like that. I don't know when they ever will. If they have to wait on me, a busy WAHM, to accompany them on playdates and excursions, that's a lot of wasted time for them. No wonder kids end up watching so much TV.