I think everyone involved did a good job.

You marry someone; they don't appear to be keeping up their end; you have doubts about whether it will work out; both of you put out your best efforts, and it all does work out happily in the end.

I simply can't imagine why all those people are hating on you for simply having doubts about your marriage. Since when did "having second thoughts" become a capital crime?

Good for you, I wish you many happy years!

Wonderful piece. I imagine a lot of couples are going through a similar scenario currently.

My grandparents from Kansas were married at the start of the Great Depression and the Dust Bowl and were married for seventy years. My parents were married for thirty years until my father's death. The creativity and forbearance it takes to make it through extraordinarily rough times and not just survive but thrive as a couple seems to be one of life's richest rewards.

When you reach a point in your marriage that is truly challenging, you should be able to handle it better than you would have before.

Article a little while back about a woman who got divorced, has kids, and is now teaching writing at a university...but a little phase of "being poor"...boo-hoo...

Then, Geneen Roth, who also grew up "comfortably," lost all her money in Madoff scheme...but not her Geneen Roth TM identity to go get more money! But still, wasn't that a touching heartfelt article?

Then, we have this article, where this upper middle class woman faces the cold hard realities the MAJORITY of people face on this planet...and not even the worst of the cold hard realities...oh, and decides to go and get a job and stay in her marriage. Whopee!

It seems like Ms. Walsh likes to support young female writers...if they come from upper middle class backgrounds.

Lower middle class, working class...not so much. Not the right demographic for Salon advertisers, apparently.

Interesting also - the three women writers above all have economic resources that plenty of working class and poor males DO NOT have. So they've got advantages plenty of men in this country do not, to pursue their creativity. Give me a break.

I agree with the person who commented that there was a gender angle to these articles, and what we expect of women versus men when it comes to "catharsis" and "sharing" etc.

A very good read. I look forward to another piece with the gender roles reversed. My ex-wife (yes, EX) mooched off of me for years without even trying to find work. Divorcing her was the best decision I've ever made. I wonder what she would say about it? I'm an a-hole because all I care about is money? Probably.

As my old (and now deceased) neighbor, Mr. Himmelfarb, used to put it, "There's no romance without finance." His quip seems a tad materialistic, but has an aspect of truth.

Passing judgement may be my hobby, and dumping spouses because they aren't rich enough may be yours. It's all a matter of taste in a world of shallow, vacuous upper-middle-class people -- probably Salon's carefully chosen demographic.

I'll bet if you asked the editor, she'd say, "Unfortunately, our writers and our readers all come from the same limited demographic. I'd be really happy to get more diverse work, send it to me."

If you notice, the stories on the site that seem to be the most consistently popular are the ones that are the most exotic to the readers. I for one would be very interested in reading writers who grew up poor, American poor certainly but even more Indian poor or African poor or North Korean poor...

Unfortunately, one of the many downsides to being poor is you don't have leisure to write, and you don't have the examples of other people who write. I know many people who have written books, it's perfectly conceivable for me to write one. Imagine if you had never even seen a "writer" in person.

It is only in recent years and in modern Western societies that marriage has been promoted as some fairytale love affair. And still, in certain circles, it continues to be about money, power and position.

Do you think all those uber-rich people send their kids to elite private schools and ivy league colleges and join private clubs so their beloved children can hook up with some poor waif that will suck at the teat of the family fortune. They are positioning their offspring to make an advantageous match that will further the family's position and wealth. And don't think there isn't alot of backroom deals going on there people. In the middle-ages, the church promoted marriage mostly as a way to control property rights and the power-elite. It was never about love or God or love of God.

Cave women didn't marry a man for his good looks and sense of humour, they married him for his prowess with a spear. And they were married for their child-bearing hips. And in many societies to this day, having children isn't about seeing yourself in miniature, it's about survival.

If we are mature enough to be truly honest with ourselves, then we look for a life mate with similar base values. If your base values are towards growing wealth then you look for those qualities in a mate and you position yourself to attract that kind of mate (e.g get a Wall St job not a Walmart job). If your base values are towards growing children, then you'd be an idiot to marry a child-hater who'd rather travel then settle down.

Hollywood and fairytales feed us the idea that we can meet and marry a prince or princess for love and their family will overlook our hillbilly family. Or that we can leave our mommyanddaddy-supplied Manhatten apartment, take our Master's degreed ass across the country, hook up with some skateboarder living on the "wrong side" (is there a right side?) of Venice beach, and somehow live out the dream of being a privileged freelancer supported by our loverboy.

I liked the piece, but the writer was definitely deluded at the outset. I felt like I was reading a fairytale as she described their early love affair. I was shocked that it ended in marriage, but not at all surprised that in a few months it was rocky for reasons that were bloody obvious from the start. Fortunately, she found a way to deal with it...so far. Good for her and for him. The excerpt made me want to read the book, so I guess she is a successful writer after all.