Letters to the Editor
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My anti-aging secret
As a woman who's passed the half-century mark, what keeps me young is the 35-year-old cutie who comes over whenever I like. But I'm willing to give him up for Nexus6.
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the curse of good looks?
I had two thoughts, first of all, while we all want to look our best, there's a study that says that beautiful women are significantly unhappier than plainer women.
The study stopped short of identifying the cause, but I can think of two reasons right off the bat: first, if the woman makes her living from her looks or relies on them for attention, etc., she suffers from a greater than average fear of losing her beauty. This fear turning slowly into reality can make her very miserable.
The second thing is that beauties are subject to a lot of negative attention from all the wrong kinds of people. They will be seduced and dumped by any number of playboys, but that is only part of the problem. If they are not smart and savvy, pretty women will generally end up in a very shallow crowd that values them only for what they look like. As for what happens to their husbands, friends, and (all too often) bosses as a beautiful woman gets older--well, they do not hesitate to replace her with younger, prettier women. No wonder she's obsessed!
Something to think about as we age, isn't it?
Secondly, I think the author's advice is only for these pretty girls scared of losing their edge. I mean, wow, does anything scream desperate aging woman more than fitted knee-length skirt, Botox, and an artificially colored, shoulder-length, "hairdo"?
Good grief, I'd look ten years OLDER than I am if I tried that. Yuck, yuck and yuck.
Being gorgeous is like winning the lottery--not all its cracked up to be.
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Beauty and age
The second thing is that beauties are subject to a lot of negative attention from all the wrong kinds of people. They will be seduced and dumped by any number of playboys, but that is only part of the problem. If they are not smart and savvy, pretty women will generally end up in a very shallow crowd that values them only for what they look like. As for what happens to their husbands, friends, and (all too often) bosses as a beautiful woman gets older--well, they do not hesitate to replace her with younger, prettier women.
This is why I like aging. I'm more likely to get attention for things about me that count instead of the thing about me that's the least important. I'm 40, and my grooming is more minimalist than it was when I was 20. It wasn't too extreme then, either, but I bother a lot less now
My own personal belief is that nothing ages a woman like fighting her age. A Botoxed face isn't the same thing as a young face, nor is a lifted face, and dyed hair isn't the same thing as natural hair. It isn't even natural hair that's a different color. It's chemically damaged hair.
As far as clothing goes, I've always thought that trying to look young just makes a woman look ridiculous. I certainly don't want to look like I'm trying to compete with the college kids! That's downright pathetic. I like my life piles better now than I did when I was 20. Why try to look like I'd want to go back?
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Youth and beauty
Thanks for all the responses, and different perspectives on how we're all facing the aging process.
I just want to comment on Sandra's assertion that the story equates being attractive with being young -- I don't think that at all! I don't love my lines, but I like that Charla Krupp's perspective is pretty age appropriate. (The book cover claims it'll show you how to look ten years younger, but I harbor no such fantasies.)
What I hoped to convey was my own struggle with that line between the things that feel good and fun, and the stuff that's based on that More magazine esteem bashing crap.
I don't think I've ever been mistaken for one day younger than my true age, and I'm okay with that. I just want to be my own best version of 42.
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I second those who say exercise is the key
I am 51 and don't wear makeup because running gives me a healthy glow to my skin which I think looks better than makeup. At my age a lot of foundation has a way of looking dry in the fine little crepey lines which I think makes me look older. I think there are some foundations that don't do that but most of the time I just dispense with it and think I have more color in my face without it.
Exercise also helps you carry yourself with more energy and I don't know, just differently from an older sedentary person. Others have said that but I second that too. I guess it's the muscles inside.
I also second the person who said the high energy level helps a person in his or her 50's get and keep a job...it's in your gait, movements, attitude, as well as your manner of dress. I've been going to an employment transition group "just in case" for about a year and the guest speakers always seem to mention positive energy level in the interview...but so many of those in attendance in their 50's look beaten down. It's understandable. But one guest speaker said "Do whatever it takes to get rid of your bitterness at how you were treated at your last job, before you go in to the interview, so you will seem positive and upbeat to the interviewer." Meanwhile, (understandably) a lot of the people's posture just looks hangdog.
Looking frumpy is partly about looking kinda hangdog I think. You can look sharp and pulled together in a "classic" wardrobe that's crisp and not trendy. I would say keep your energy up and that's a huge percentage even if my neck is damn crepey, dammit.
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Warts And All
However, I must add! If you do eschew makeup, do not go too many days without a good once-over in the lighted magnifying makeup mirror. Those black chin hairs can spring up overnight and it's really embarrassing to realize I've had one and didn't know it. I wish we had Anymous. Happy now, Anonymous-Takers-Away-ers?