Letters to the Editor
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How does a single father ever get laid?
I'd say that the fact this guy can afford a nanny and yoga classes and got to keep his house is the reason he even finds this question important enough to write about. He's making a bid for sympathy here, where the facts don't really add up to his needing much.
On top of that, he lets drop that he is only pushing 40 and women in his age range stop him in bars to tell him he's "fine". Sorry, man, as someone who's been there, I can only say you need to suck it up and quit whining.
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A Million Little Pieces of Ass
Wait a minute. Discerning Salon-type readers are responding with actual indignation, advice, sympathy, and other manifestations of believing a word of this?
Oh God, now THIS is comedy.
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Easy
Stay-Home Moms are a gold mine if NSA pussy.
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GeeGee
He's black, just check out his website. Whether or not he's African-American (he could be of Carribean descent, who knows) is another matter, but he looks like a "brother."
Most of the people in this letter section assumed he was some white guy with a black (or Latino) ex, which I find kind of funny. Is it because it's an articulate story that doesn't have the stereotypical trappings of black life? A) He doesn't speak in the vernacular? B) He's obviously got some money? C) He's not a criminal? Maybe his daughter isn't biracial at all. There are African-Americans with curly hair, and Trey is definitely in the light-skinned black category.
jeez, white liberals are sometimes so friggin predicactable. Maybe instead of assuming anyone who can sling two words together is white, you should just not assume anything.
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I stopped having any sympathy
...right about the time I found out this guy has a nanny. It's so tough!
His situation is not particularly difficult, nor representative, and therefore not all that interesting and/or instructive. Plus, it's boring and trivial, which is sort of the opposite of what an excerpt is striving for.
I think single fatherhood could be better represented.
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Single moms & dads
OK - I got pretty steamed when I read the posting from another "anonymous" who anticipated a warring tribe of Broadsheet Feminists would be on their way to hunt Trey down. In a quick read of other letters, it seems others agree with me - Mr. Anonymous' assumption (that "feminist" means anti-single-father) is a little out there, and perhaps he (because yes, I'm assuming he's a he) needs a bit more exposure to women and how even feminists have individual opinions.
But beyond that - I loved this story. And I'm a feminist, raised by a single mom with your classic dead-beat dad NOT in the picture - who'da thunk it? Trey to me sounds like the best type of parent - trying his best with his kids, and also trying to carve a life out for himself (which will only benefit his kids, as they see what adulthood is really about). I wish him dates, good hair days (for him and his kids), the odd Pepsi-orgy, and lots of love and luck.
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Most of the people in this letter section assumed he was some white guy with a black (or Latino) ex, which I find kind of funny. Is it because... because... because...
It's probably because, in the hair portion of the story, he said she looks like her mother.
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Good piece
It was funny and it rang true. Trey comes off as a decent, likeable, respectable and responsible person...and at least one drunk blond thought he was fine...so, I wouldn't worry too much about his changes in the romance department.
I'll cast my advise for Trey with the majority...
1. Kick Carmen in the ass for being an overreaching, obnoxious, insensitive heartbreaking bitch. But nicely of course. Stop accomodating her inability to let you go as her fall back position. She has her white rasta dude...she traded you for that? Serious judgment problems there. You can do better my man.
2. You really weren't comfortable with the whole rubber vagina thing anyway...otherwise you would have used it right away and not stuck it in your drawer for your kids to find so that you could justify throwing it out. Hands work just fine if it comes to that.
3. You're gut impulse to leave the babysitter alone...go with that. Nothing but trouble there. Too young. Too forward. In fact, you might want to consider letting her go because of her lack of judgment and decorum in coming on to you. What about the kids? It's too mixed up with them. Too complicated. Until you have met someone you are really, really sure about, keep your two worlds apart. The dating world...separate from the kiddy world.
4. Lot's of other places to find a lay besides bars. Don't let your bachelor friends bully you into places you don't feel comfortable with. If I were single, I'd love to bump into a guy like you at the book store or supermarket.
5. I'm going to go find your book and read the whole thing. You're a good guy and a good writer and you made me smile. Your story about the kids and ex finding your tawdry little rubber devise reminded me of the time I dropped a just purchased latex devise in front of a million people on a subway car...and it kept bouncing away from me as I tried desperately to pick it up and put it back into it's basic brown bag...shit like that does happen.
Yeah, by the way....knee jerk feminist here. But...as you can see, not by necessity a Man Hater. Feminist...does not necessarily equate with Man Hater. Got that, all you guys who think all women who stand up for themselves hate men?
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@concentric
concentric wrote:
And what's with the criticism about the rubber pussy? Cyberskin is popular for a reason! And how often do women get criticized for having a vibrator? Fair is fair, I say. I've got to note that just about all the criticism about Trey having one is coming from men...what's up with that?
Nothing other than the old frat boy rubric: "never ever admit you aren't banging a real bona fide flesh and blood b*tch, as opposed to having to resort to .....ahhhhh....appliances".
The funny thing, though, is that even back in college most frat boys only bragged they were getting any, while they were really only doing the "American Pie" thing. (Choice of real pie optional).
It's all part of the faux macho BS mystique. NO "real man" admits to getting it on with anything other than a real woman".
However, a couple of items I've read in the last few months might explain this guy's caution. One is that there now seems to be a spiking and worrisome increase in throat cancer among older males. Epemidiologists have evidently traced it to cunnilingus in their younger days - when the women they were servicing had the HPV and didn't know it. Now the "chickens" are coming home to roost.
Second, there appears to be a huge spike in STDs, espcially anitibiotic -resistant gonorrhea, as well as Herpes simplex. Herpes simplex can also be transmitted to the genitals, and dealing with it ain't sport. (A Peace Corps friend I knew contracted it, and still has to deal with it - even via medication)
Short of asking any prospective lay to sign an affivadit of sexual "cleanliness" (and to prove it with the lab test results -signed by the labs) the guy is quite right to choose his cyberskin pussy.
All puritanical and pseudo-macho objections to the contrary.