Letters to the Editor
-
If I got caught reading this...
...I would never hear the end of it from my better half. This is definitely reading for newly-single guys only. Still, thanks for posting it.
-
Don't Be A Pussy - Fuck The Nanny
And change your locks - your ex was totally snooping when she found your pocket pussy. Don't believe a word of that bullshit story that the kids were fighting with it. She was trying to humiliate you.
-
The movie will be called...
... Miss Firedoubt.
The main star will be Will Smith, with Michelle Obama as his bitchy ex.
The subplot will feature Robin Williams and Sally Field falling in love with each other as the two white grandparents in this second generation biracial family.
Britney Spears, in an attempt to avoid type casting, will be the weekend nanny.
The fake vagina will be played by the Jamie Lynn Vibrating Cyberskin Pet Pussy & Ass as supplied by
http://gentlemenstoybox.com whose copywriter says:
Enjoy the supple and sensuous contours of this realistically designed remote-controlled vibrating pussy and ass. Taken from a direct cast of 2006 Penthouse Pet of the Year, Jamie Lynn's own fantastic vagina, this one-of-a-kind piece allows you to indulge your wildest fantasies over and over again with a certified piece of this superstar. Made from incredibly lifelike cyberskin® material, this piece is expertly detailed and colored, as well as being super soft and smooth just like real skin.
It will probably win a special Oscar for Best Prosthesis.
-
and your point?
NOPE, women never disregard the men attached to the penis and just get laid and move on.
So you got hurt once and now all women are bad and only use men.
Now why would you attribute it to something that might have happened to me personally? (Which it did not).
You seem very fond of the "If Women Do This, it is OK to do the same back" argument.
Yes, SO? Lots of women run their lives this way. Feminism was founded on the belief that all women are entitled to act like the biggest male assholes.
-
@ Brightstar
In that, you're a great role model.
-
By the age of 42
And change your locks - your ex was totally snooping when she found your pocket pussy. Don't believe a word of that bullshit story that the kids were fighting with it. She was trying to humiliate you.
One key life lesson I have learned is that the worst, most creative motive a woman would have that you can think of is probably the correct one. Women seem to REALLY enjoy revenge and are much more devious and negative than most men are capable of imagining women to be.
They often seem to love to laugh about how gullible men are in this regard.
So I second this person's interpretation of events.
-
Amerigo - I love it...I just have a few notes.
Will Smith is a fine choice...he's the go to guy for these kind of things. Maybe we should get that guy who plays "Will Smith" (I forget the name) on that UPN/CW television show (is it still on) to save money, though. 20-million dollars a picture is a lot of cheddar, you know what I'm saying.
You know, I think we should get Macy Grey to play the kooky-hippie dippie wife dating a white rasta. Though I doubt she could get insurance what with the heroin an all. I can't really see Michelle Obama eating raw food and living in Venice Beach.
Sally Field is hot right now, but Robin Williams - not so much.
Other than that, great idea!
-
Enough of the self-pity
I'm sure wallowing in self-pity is a great spectacle to present to this guy's children. There are lots of women out there who want to date single dads. They're called single moms. A lot of times their children come first and they just want to be friends with benefits. There is no shortage of female companionship for a single dad if he has an ounce of personality, self-confidence, and a desire to enjoy what women have to offer. If he'd rather fantasize about sex with a hot twentysomething woman, then he's going to be a frustrated schmuck.
I'm speaking from experience. I was a full-time single dad to three teenagers years ago. I made having a social life an important part of my own sanity and coping with what seemed to be the crushing responsibility of single fatherhood. I met many fun and interesting women and spending time with them left me much better able to get back to interacting with my kids again.
This guy's got a nanny and has an ex-wife nearby, so he should have time for a social life. Whining about not getting laid is just pathetic.
-
Too bland
Despite you're unenviable situation and based on this article alone, I'm afraid you're just not a very interesting writer.
-
???
If he'd rather fantasize about sex with a hot twentysomething woman, then he's going to be a frustrated schmuck.
Don't be ridiculous, he is only about 40. Of course he can have sex with a hot twenty something or a hot fifty something, or just about anything in between. Personally I prefer the hot twenty something, but that is probably a personal idiosyncrasy by the standards of Salon.
Hell, I am a lukewarm fifty something, and still get hit on by hot twenty or thirty somethings, though of course I am savvy enough to know that if they are flirting with me, then their 100-piece baggage train is just out of sight over the horizon.
The price of having sex with the hot twentysomething is that he probably can't expect a hot twentysomething with a Ph.D. and a trust fund who will give him a Rolex on Valentine's Day. Then again, it probably would not be to hard to score with Paris Hilton, and if he is a successful screenwriter or author, then maybe he can. The pen is mightier...
All this is speculation, because this is a comic semifictional memoir. A creative writer works with the material at hand and makes it memorable. Don't ask me how I know this. Call it intuition.
-
Why so mean?
This is a book, an excerpt from a book, probably not even an entire chapter and all you can do is say how dare you whine about not getting laid?
How dare you express how hard it can be to go from married life to single with kids in a few short months and how hard it can be to jump back into the dating pool when your ex is in your kitchen 5 days a week?
So no one should be allowed to speak about their experiences? I wouldn't even call this whining, just sort of first your friends take you to a bar, no thanks. Then you get a sex toy to tide you over, your wife/kids find it and now you are too embarressed to even touch it again. Oh yeah, it was such a whine fest and po wittle o me story.
Can no one relate their personal experiences without being called a whiner? No wonder so many people are depressed and on medication, they aren't allowed to tell people about the hardships that happen in their life because everyone just says suck it up, stop whining, there are worse problems to have. Gee great, yeah I'm sure he knows there are people dying in Africa, doesn't change the fact that his life has been changed and he's not sure what to do. At least he probably won't ever read the snipings of the bitter people here.