Letters to the Editor
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Wow Tacroy80
That is so messed up. So basically, if you were not responsable, they would help you, but because you've had a tragedy they won't?!!
Messed up.
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Happy families are all the same
Miserable families are miserable each in their own way
-Tolstoy.
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Putting of the payback
I buy the story. I think it is an important story to tell.
You nailed the denial part on the head.
We don't talk about it, we pretend it doesn't exist, we avoid the phone calls and the bills and keep up the illusion.
The credit card companies encourage this and profit massively by it, but it is not their fault.
It is us buying the lifestyle on credit, pretending that we can put off having to pay it off with boring, hard earned cash.
I've been there and lost. No more credit cards period.
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Debt
Upfront: I'm not a trust fund kid, nor did my parents or anyone else have spare cash. I have largely been on my own financially since age 18. A couple of points:
1. Free-lancing, while fun and intellectually stimulating, is a dead-end professionally and financially. Bite the bullet and look for a salaried position in a field where you won't lose your mind or your self-respect. A regular paycheck can help "stabilize" your income, hopefully provide health insurance and a 401K (however meager) and boost your credit score. Work full-time and take the occasional gig, so long as it doesn't interfere with the full-time position (Been there, done that). Look at the part-time gigs as icing on your basic cake and as a way to help pay off that debt.
I free-lanced in my 20s, and while I'm glad I did that, I'm delighted that I don't do that anymore. I switched fields (after 3 degrees), and 20 years out, am far happier AND financially secure.
2. On credit hell because of medical crises. Try to work with a medical social worker. I bet there are OODLES of mistakes on your bills. I had a health crisis in 1999, and forwhatever reason, was billed for a hip replacement. It wasn't true, but the medical center wanted $7,000 from me until I got everything sorted out. It's time-consuming, soul-sucking, and hard as hell when you feel like shit. If you can find a health-care advocate, that might help lower the stress. But it's a shitty situation with very shitty (and few) options.
3 Final point: Right now many every-day Americans are suffering from "Affluenza." We drop a hell of a lot of money on stuff we really don't need (designer coffee, endless cell phone minutes, trendy clothes, stupid vehicles, etc). The best advice I ever got was "be downwardly mobile." Schedule clothes buying, try to minimize the electronic tinker-toys, DON'T buy new cars, etc. To a large extent, I had to re-think my life to make money go much, much farther. It was hard for about a year, but once I finally adjusted, the lack of stress was worth it. Fashion plate I'm not. However, I am almost debt-free (except for the mortgage, and I'm working on it).
Good luck!
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Thank you...
....for sharing your experience. I know some posters are going to slag you because they think you're "spoiled" or that your debt load is too puny to warrant discussion, but I was almost in the same situation as you have described, and I kept my mouth shut and didn't reach out for help precisely because I was afraid people would think I was spoiled, and because I figured that as long as my debt was under the national average, I was doing ok. I'm a single white woman, no kids, grew up middle class, and educated to the teeth. I had NO excuse to rack up the credit card debt I did - every step of the way, I knew better and I did it any way. And when the piper came calling (the CONSTANT phone calls, which I, too, never answered), I buried my head in the sand for months and refused to check my online accounts or open my mail. I was so ashamed and afraid to acknowledge the pit I had dug myself into.
Long story short, I, too, ended up receiving some help from my family, and cutting waaaay back on expenses - and a year and a half later, I am credit card debt-free. Now I make one (small!) purchase on each of my two credit cards per month so I can pay them off to help my credit score. All other purchases are cash or debit card. I am finally living within my means. So far, so good. Good luck to you, too.
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bankruptcy = scads of...
new credit card offers. why? because your income to debt ratio just got a transfusion and to giant lines of...whatever it is one's ratio gets.
having done it, i was amazed at all the people trying to help me "repair" my credit - by offering me insane amounts of credit.
i know we all bear the responsibility of getting into whatever situation we get into, but when credit companies are allowed to buy recently bankrupt names from the gov't...makes you wonder how serious they are about not wanting people to file.
and yeah, while i dig the angle of the article, 10k of debt (and two months of "hard work" to get out of it) is bullshit.
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bankruptcy = scads of...
new credit card offers. why? because your income to debt ratio just got a transfusion and two giant lines of...whatever it is one's ratio gets.
having done it, i was amazed at all the people trying to help me "repair" my credit - by offering me insane amounts of credit.
i know we all bear the responsibility of getting into whatever situation we get into, but when credit companies are allowed to buy recently bankrupt names from the gov't...makes you wonder how serious they are about not wanting people to file.
and yeah, while i dig the angle of the article, 10k of debt (and two months of "hard work" to get out of it) is bullshit.
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ah, the pre-emptive apology...
...the "I know some of you are going to say the blatantly obvious, sensible thing, so let me just blow that off. With the right amount of 'tude and false humility, folks will buy it..."
Come on. This article was a waste of space. I cannot muster sympathy. For someone like Tacroy, certainly. Tacroy's story needs telling. But putting yourself into deep debt through bar tabs, lattes, and CDs... yes, you're spoiled and kind of dumb.
And it's just sick that there's so much help for you, and so little for people who wanted educations to better their lot, or just didn't want to die in a medical emergency.
When I was making no money, I lived like I was making no money. I wasn't being saintly, and I'm not looking for praise.
It was just common sense. I counted myself fortunate that I no student loan or medical debts. I had few friends, but I knew they were true. I also knew that I had the means to move out of poverty with effort and time; in that sense, I was rich.
I'm really tired of spoiled people who should know better, and their apologists.