Letters to the Editor
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To Laurel 962
How many of these waiting foster children have you adopted?
Go to www.adoptuskids.com
Take a lot around.
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sad
My first thought was that this poor child was better off without you, as selfish and self-involved as you clearly are.
But then I thought no, that's not true.
You are a vastly overprivileged American with resources that most people in the world cannot even imagine, and this child would have benefited greatly from those resources. It's enormously sad that you didn't have enough love in your hearts to accept her as she was, and to devote some of the those resources to her.
Instead, you have condemned this child to a life of unimaginable suffering, and all because she wasn't the perfect child that you demanded. The limitations you describe aren't even that ghastly. In fact, it sounds like she could have enjoyed a happy, productive -- even normal! -- life with early intervention. But now, thanks to you, she'll never receive those services, and her life will be much worse for it.
And now you want us, your readers, to relieve you of your guilt. Sorry, I just can't go along with that. You had a chance to rescue this child, but you threw her back into the pool because she wasn't the idealized child you demanded.
That was a horrible thing to do, and you should just admit it to yourself, and not look for redemption here. (And if you got paid for this article, at least have the decency to send it to that orphanage.)
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Just One
We get one life. Just one lap around the track. The only thing that any of us truly have is our one life. Some of us have more choices than others. Most of us would like to have more choices until we are burdened by having too many choices.
Each of us has a life and it is ours to figure out how to best live that life. For those who want children, for some it is adopting children with special needs, it is something that we want and we know that we can handle it, that we can do well by them. For others we want something else. Knowing what we want and what we can handle in this life is something that we all struggle with. Choices can be hard.
I'm not sure why so many feel as though they can step inside someone else's shoes, would choose something different, and then feel superior for it. It's just flat out obnoxious and arrogant.
I've personally throrughly researched adoption-- both domestic and international. They both have a lot of pros and cons. The bottom line is that people build their famlies through all sorts of ways, this does not mean that one is better than another, we each have our own path.
The *only* thing I'd like to share about domestic adoption is that it has many myths and that many people who don't consider it probably do so because they've heard a lot of misinformation.
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friends of laurel962
Is anyone else a little worried that laurel962 is apparently around so many internationally adopted children while espousing such a harsh, angry, negative view of their parents and their family-making stories? I don't know why laurel962 has so many "friends" in the international adoption world, but if I were one of her "friends" I would be quite appalled to learn of her hostile viewpoint about my family. I guess that best hope is that she keeps it hidden except when trolling online.
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I think this baby was lucky...
...not to have Jessica as a mother. She was lucky Jessica realized it BEFORE taking her home because too many kids wind up abused or in foster care, just abandoned, or even killed when they do to live up to the adopters expectations.
I hope and pray that Jessica's unborn baby is born PERFECT and ADORABLE and meets all of Jessica's standards and criteria. But I cannot help wonder what she will do if the child born to her is ADD, or in need of special help with speech or has any other "imperfection"? Wonder if she had every genetic test known to man done to assure the quality of THIS child she's expecting and looking forward to to mothering, as she once looked forward to mothering another child.
Did she get to check off boxes of what would be "acceptable" for this one she's carrying? Or, is blood thicker than water and you love "your own" no matter what -- even though everyone claims that adoption "is the same as if" born to you???
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Will I ever stop thinking about the child I rejected?
I hope not. I hope it haunts you forever. I hope you lie awake every night and wonder if that child ever got adopted and was the joy of another family's life... or if she languished in that orphanage and died of neglect and failure to thrive because you couldn't "handle" her speech and ADD!!!
And what do you think your unborn child will think of you someday...when he or she reads what you did? Think they'll be proud of your choices? Are YOU?
I cannot for the life of me understand why you published this? Do you expect pity?
I actually thought it was a satire when I first starting reading it. Deciding to adopt from India cause you took YOGA! Not wanting the ties of open adoption....eating in an expensive restaurant and thinking about poor mothers who cannot raise their children...not wanting to read anything "more critical" or "complicated" about adoption! Being afraid the child would not be adorable.... I thought it was a joke.
Sadly, you really are that shallow!
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Attila the Hen
Salon allows for the desperation of some Attila the Hen to such an extent that it forgets to publish the version of her husband. Fornicating for motherhood surely deserves a man´s comment. What we have is Salon´s own fucking for virginity when a bulimic child craving is not questioned but allowed to pose as some normal female behaviour.
Just imagine the everyday life of constantly facing the daunting reminders of the obsessive immaturity of a character with the ego of a raging tooth.
How does anyone survive this ordeal? With the heart of a cucumber fried in snow?