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A few writers have noted this already, but some people seem to have ignored it, so I just want to remind everyone that the author of this article has completed exactly one marathon, in 4 hours and 16 minutes.
Which, we are led to believe, makes him an infinitely superior kind of runner to Oprah and her 2:29.
You heard it here first, on Salon, folks. 13 minutes is what separates the ELITE runners from the flabby, feel-good amateur television hosts who are bringing mediocrity to America and causing us good Americans to lose to the Kenyans and... to... other Americans who aren't really American.
