Letters to the Editor
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What obituary?
I found this article interesting, but I was disturbed slightly by this line: "where a MySpace page takes the place of your obituary"... excuse me, what obituary is this?
Sadly, most people are not going to get their picture in the NYT. I have always found it deeply depressing to see the endless rows of tiny-typed obituaries in any but the smallest town's newspaper, knowing that for many of those names that will be their only memorial, and the vast majority of the people who might still know them, even if they glance at the page (even if they buy the paper that day) may not see their name.
Parents & relatives often don't really know their teenagers. The fact that they can at least in the end find out what their kids really (or at least publicly) thought, talked like, enjoyed & everything else is probably both upsetting and in some way healing.
It's a shame about the insensitivity of some of the gawkers, but as other posters have noted, not a particularly unusual shame. I don't think this should overshadow the way in which it's wonderful that there is something creative left of a person, some kind of self expression that everyone can see.
Though I'm sure a lot of parents & friends would prefer to have something more easily idealized. Another fascinating consequence of the information age -- information about our intimate acquaintances.
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Disturbing
It truly disturbs me how sick young people like those who post of MyDeathSpace always hide behind the First Amendment, which somehow corrupts and cheapens what is our greatest freedom. Many of these losers will regret what they post, since MyDeathSpace is every bit as public as Myspace. Therefore, what they write may come back to haunt them when they grow up (if ever).
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Morbid as new?
Pietras writes: "Twenty years ago, death was discussed in muted tones, the deceased treated reverently."
That's just a load of crap, first of all. JP seems to mistake appearance for reality. Does JP really think this is a sudden shift in how others feel about death? Silly. Now there is a forum readily available, and that's the only change.
There is plenty of morbidity in our "muted tones" around death as well. I'm not going to visit "mydeathspace", though the fact that it exists is no more morbid to me than our common treatment of death. People are saying anonymously what they have wanted to say publicly, but were/are afraid to say. This is no sea change around death, or morbidity, or bad taste. It’s just a more visible medium to bring it to attention.
Now the anonymous regular folks are subject to the same post-mortem scrutiny previously reserved for only the famous and influential. What strides we're making towards the equality of the gross.
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Get some damn perspective.
"It truly disturbs me how sick young people like those who post of MyDeathSpace always hide behind the First Amendment, which somehow corrupts and cheapens what is our greatest freedom."
I'm hoping this comment was meant as ironic, especially as it appears in an online forum full of psuedonyms and impulsive comments.
Every scold in these letters needs some perspective
MyDeathSpace has an estimated 8,000 members, less .01 percent of the millions of people online. Of those, few post regularly and fewer still post disrespectful things. There are obscure fetish discussion boards which get as much traffic.
There is NO unique crisis of sickness hiding behind the 1st amendment here. It's a discussion board about information which, again, is readily available to the public. Detached gossip about the deaths of strangers is longstanding, if unappealing, human trait.
What really "corrupts and cheapens" here is an overwrought story which tries to stir up moral panic about an obscure website and implies legal steps may be necessary.
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softdog defending the indefensible
Get some damn perspective.
"It truly disturbs me how sick young people like those who post of MyDeathSpace always hide behind the First Amendment, which somehow corrupts and cheapens what is our greatest freedom."
I'm hoping this comment was meant as ironic, especially as it appears in an online forum full of psuedonyms and impulsive comments.
-->Yet no one here is defaming a dead kid, like your favorite site, MyDeathSpace.com.
Every scold in these letters needs some perspective
-->You mean your perspective, right?
MyDeathSpace has an estimated 8,000 members, less .01 percent of the millions of people online. Of those, few post regularly and fewer still post disrespectful things. There are obscure fetish discussion boards which get as much traffic.
-->Your point is?
There is NO unique crisis of sickness hiding behind the 1st amendment here. It's a discussion board about information which, again, is readily available to the public. Detached gossip about the deaths of strangers is longstanding, if unappealing, human trait.
-->You just don't get it do you?
What really "corrupts and cheapens" here is an overwrought story which tries to stir up moral panic about an obscure website and implies legal steps may be necessary.
-->What cheapens the First Amendment is pricks like you who believe it is acceptable to defame dead kids, attack their defenders (who include their parents) and then hide behind it.
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Their Space
"Morbid curiosity and ridicule have replaced respect for the deceased"?
Isn't this just a more in-depth obituary? Sure the title is catchy to this story, and it grabs the reader, but is it true?
I think it is a cool way to post a death.This kids my space was all about him, his likes, who he was, or wanted to be at that time in his life.If people want to know that about him, what better place to see it? Usually kids' my space is very revealing, right? it's in your face,honestly who they are.What better way to honor them, than to let everyone see that?Sheesh.I bet he would think it was awesome.I think obits in the paper are just notices of a death.Most don't really tell anyone about the person themselves.How is that respecting the dead?
Shout from the rooftops about who he was.Celebrate it.That is honoring someone in death.