Letters to the Editor
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Compromise is the name of the game
Ann - you are very lucky. Your passion and your profession collide. If you need to go away for 10 days for a book tour, or for 4 weekends in a row - hubbie doesn't get to complain, after all it is work. If he goes along he gets to wait for you while you do 3 early am radio plugs, an am local tv show, spend the afternoon waiting while you sign books and then go to dinner with your local publisher's rep. Boring, tiring. He gets to see you, but not be with you and he can't complain because it's your work.
Maybe hubbie could take up something acceptable like marathon running and acting in the local community theater. BTW if you have ever been involved with someone into either of these past times they take up HUGE amounts of time and go year round.
OK then back to the motor cross stuff. How about the two of you agree on a reasonable and mutually acceptable number of long weekends for him to go away. I say 4. You sit down with the calendar in winter when the race dates come out. Together you pick 4 race weekends for him to participate in. Then you send him alone on 2, you attend 1 and your whole family goes together to watch him race in another. I would suggest you make the ones you attend close, but that's your decision. When you and the family attend you go as watchers knowing your husband will be busy. He is performing, competing, racing, he can't and shouldn't have to coddle you. Go to cheer him on. Surely you wouldn't expect to be coddling him between radio interviews on a book tour. You would expect him to suck up and deal.
When it is race time, hubbie needs to leave knowing that all is good at home. It is not fair to try and whine him out of a race you both agreed upon. He should come home to a happy house. If he makes you happy dropping a bunch of races then he should be made happy about the ones he goes to. Also know your deal is iron clad. You don't get to ask him to trade because you have a book tour, a friend's wedding, a cold, the kid's graduation what ever. Just as you expect him not to ask for an additional race beyond your agreement.
Don't forget that those few weekends alone are a great time to spend with your kids, go to a spa, hole up wriing, and or go and visit friends of yours he's not crazy about!