Letters to the Editor
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Maybe an insurance policy instead . . .
I am conflicted about this issue; I can understand a man feeling forced into a situation over which he has no control, and we are a society that likes to imagine we have control over our own bodies, our own lives. It's an illusory control, and quite likely none of the women involved feel they have control over their bodies and lives, but I certainly sympathize with wanting to feel that control.
Certainly if women have control over their bodies during pregnancy (a big "if," and only the case with a "normal", uncomplicated pregnancy), control over their lives is pretty much eliminated once the baby is born with its own agenda. Any responsible parenting she "chooses" will mean giving over a rather startling amount of control to the needs of the child.
So, men imagine women have choices, and that choices = control. To some extent, that's true--if a woman opts out of a pregnancy, she has controlled her body (again, assuming a normal, safe, legal abortion). Anything that means carrying the child means completely losing that control, once she's a parent if not sooner.
So, what if we gave men the "right" this group suggests they want, provided they carry an insurance policy that would step in to provide the child support (based on income as now, so as to eliminate concerns that this solution might mean a jackpot for the mom) if they signed away the responsibility to do so themselves? So, you carry this insurance, you can opt out if you wish. (Of course, like with auto insurance, I'd imagine your rates go up in a major way, so you probably don't get more than one "accident" of this sort.) No insurance policy--then you're stuck paying the support yourself. You have to be a responsible human being at multiple points in the transaction: you want no kid, you make sure that you use birth control or that you've had a conversation with a woman and you feel you can trust the answers you've been given. If that b.c. fails, you've got a back-up plan: the insurance policy. Plan B for men. Everyone wins. Guys get more choice and more control; children get the support to which they're entitled. If he signs away parental rights, the mom gets the $ but doesn't have to mess with the guy himself--but she also doesn't have to do the whole thing solo, at least financially speaking. Choices, control.
But not a free ride. That's what worries me about the option as the men's right group presents it. Lots of folks like a free ride. That doesn't mean, as responsible human beings, any of us really get that free ride.