Site Presented By
Sunday, Nov 8, 2009
At least there was no creepy pseudointellectual discussion on, say, how Real Dolls could be "transitional objects" for partners learning how to be intimate again under new physiological rules. It could have gone something like this, "I used the female Real Doll to show my husband how to be sensual with my postpartum ravaged body. When I wasn't up to the task, he would thankfully spend the night on the sofa with her. My male Real Doll allowed me to eventually get up to sexual speed with zero anxieties."
Why does Ms. Williams persist in the care of a physician with whom she can't, by her own admission, speak comfortably and candidly?
Why does Ms. Williams persist in the care of a physican who, by her own admission, is spookily out-of-touch with female postpartum physiology and sexuality?
Why is Ms. Williams, who describes herself in a very public way as an overachieving "Type A" personality, spookily out-of-touch with reasonable standards for American medical care and practice?
Sparky, WTF are you talking about?! This is not what the article is about. She barely mentions anything about the doctor. I don't know how you can jump to all these conclusions. Did you look inside her vagina and come up with a different diagnosis? Sheesh!
I'm also not sure why so many have been hostile about this letter. The sex after childbirth issue seems to be an almost universal one. I know it makes me nervous, and it's nice to read something to get a little insight into the phenomenon.
While Salon certainly serves a myriad of readers of all ages and stations in life, and should certainly continue to do so, as a 23 year old reader, I'm getting weary of the sudden emphasis on articles about marriage and babies. None of them have been powerful or engaging, just a bunch of narrissistic and very spoiled suburban women feeling the need to lament the sudden changes they have to make after childbirth. I hardly believe that reclaiming one's libido warrants the same attention that, say, the recent elections in the Middle East, do.
Hell, even Oprah freying James is more entertaining than Ms. Williams' posturing as a recovering sex-kitten. Personally, I've never trusted people who need to brag about their prowess, that always makes me think they're compensating for something.
Fluff like this doesn't belong on the front page. Tuck it away in Life, or Families Who Think. Between this tripe and Ayelet Waldman's neurotic ramblings about her offspring (who else needed a good long shower after that last squicky piece about her son?) I am seriously soured on the prospect of ever being a mom.
Please, Salon, remember that not all of your readers are ready for the mini-van yet!
Interesting how that story stuck with people and that it came up again in this context.
I can see why some people aren't happy with/are bored by this story. But as a woman who is thinking of having a baby before too long, this was really helpful. I haven't seen anyone write this honestly, or in such a funny way about it.
Anyone, and I mean anyone, who can write in anything like a humorous tone, about the sometimes grisly reality of post-partum life, from hemorrhoids (white-knuckling pain for some, folks) to painful sex, to episiotomies, to raw nipples... well, that person deserves some kind of a medal. And if said person can also describe the process of accepting, again with humor, the loss of what was once such an important part of her life... well, she should get to make a speech when she accepts the medal.
And the readers on Salon (for some of whom my patience grows thin), who think such writing is mere whining... they need some more real-life experience, or at least a few more trips around the block, so they can experience being on the receiving end of some humor & compassion themselves.
And, unfortunately, this article would probably not have been any better-received if posted on Broadsheet, since that's where so many men go to lodge their own complaints about women and their issues.
Substandard medical care? One can only assume that "Sparky" is a man without any firsthand experience of the world of ob/gyn. Frankly, I found it refreshing that there was no mention of a c-section.
Ironic, isn't it, that this article follows the news story earlier this week about (penetrating) sex being so good for relaxation, especially before public speaking?
I really enjoyed this article. As a mother, I totally identified with the author and I thought it was pretty brave of her to talk openly about the very personal ravages of childbirth! Likewise, I remember my midwife telling me at 6 weeks post partum that it was okay to have sex again if I wanted to (as I recall, my reaction was more "yikes!" than "let's go").
To those readers who complain about the author's tone or her medical experiences, I'm guessing that you've never given birth. Her doctor sounded like pretty much every other ob/gyn in the country. To echo another letter writer, I was happy not to be hearing about epidurals and c-sections.
To those readers who complain about too many articles about motherhood, children, childbirth, etc., I guess I would just remind you that you have a choice. You don't have to read articles that don't interest you. I haven't noticed a huge number of family-centric articles on Salon, and I like them, so I look for them.
I dislike the direction salon has taken this last year intensly I find AM's articles badly written neurotic whiny pieces of tripe at best - at worst they're quite sick, and I've been quite vocal re this in the past.
But this article is none of these and I'm puzzled by the comparisons. Its clearly written, to the point and reveals issues that effect all of us one way or another after childbirth. As a man I emphasised with her and her partner and will find it useful to keep in mind,
thankyou Mz Williams for sharing.
Much of the initial coverage about Fort Hood turned out to be wrong. Is there anything wrong with that?
The accountability imposed by another country for the CIA's kidnapping and torture reveals much about our own.
Fox News' morning show plays to type, talking about whether Muslims in the Army should face "special debriefings"
The survivor and author is upset about comparisons some on the right are making to genocide
Once seen as a lunatic fringe, reactionary anti-women groups are courting respectability
Salon headlines in your mailbox
