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Sunday, Nov 8, 2009
Sex used to be good, then she had a baby. Then it was bad. Then it got good again.Fine. Good for her.
This is almost, but not, as banal and pointless and self-congratulatory as Steve Almond's ridiculous essay about a blogger who doesn't like his writing.
I am surprised doctors have not caught on to excess prolactin after childbirth as being the cause of lack of sexual interest in women.
Certainly there are medicines to bring down prolactin and increase libido again.
Seems doctors are asleep at the wheel or badly trained.
Geez! Do I have to come up with EVERYTHING?!?
A bit of writing appropriate for a blog somewhere, but as the lead article?
Funny satire, ccps.
It's not "fornication" if you're married.
(Has there been an editorial/marketing decision to aim Salon at women aged 35 - 45? It seems like there is less and less hard news and more female-oriented fluff. My desire to resubscribe is hanging by a thread.)
I'm a 20 something young woman who is interested in having children at some point in my life and never thought about the travails of post-baby sex. I found the article informative and food for thought. At the very least I won't be surprised by the information when I'm more emotionally invested in the baby-process (i.e. pregnant). At the most I hope that if I experience similar issues I have a gentle reminder to be kind to myself and my husband and to take my time without beating myself up.
What the writer apparently doesn't realize is that now that she's spawned with her husband, nature wants her to blow off sex for four years and then go look for a new set of genes to commingle with. Not very convenient, but if she follows this path, she will yet again find her sexual theatrics to be as satisfying as she once did.
Not terribly convenient, I know.
I'm posting a third letter because I grew around doctors, went to school with people who went on to study, practice, and teach medicine, and have two close friends of many years who are very fine physicians.
I find it disturbing that Ms. Williams and clearly many of the people who read her piece do not find the medical care she received to be in any way remarkable.
I find this disturbing because Ms. Williams and Salon's readership would suggest a demographic familiar medical care and practice.
I don't think there's much that's humorous in a story about a woman who receives sub-standard care from her physician.
A doctor is professionally and morally obligated to educate his or her patients about their condition, treatment plan, and possible outcome(s).
If your physician fails to do so, please find yourself another as soon as possible. There are many wonderful doctors in this country. If you can, get a referral to one from the teaching hospital nearest you.
this essay is fantastic, i read it while many were waiting for me so cannot say more... now. but super read!
Ms. Williams thinks that hemorroids are the most un-sexy thing imaginable, or "ever invented." How about no rectum at all and a bag of stool perpetually taped to her abdomen?
And that was the most un-journalistic 'lead' article imaginable.
The vehemence/glee with which so many are responding to this woman's perfectly natural reaction to "changed circumstances" says a lot. Life is hard but that doesn't mean people don't want ways out of just submitting to the "natural" diffulties of it. Like antibiotics for instance, or surgery, speaking of which why do you suppose caesareans are becoming so popular. (Hint: it's not a plot by the medical profession)
I was already into the first paragraph of the second page of Mary Elizabeth Williams' article when I realized that I was becoming extremely irritated and shut off the computer. I stewed for awhile and wondered why her story got under my skin, then I realized it wasn't the content, but the fact that the exact same sort of article has been published ad nauseum in every womens' publication on the market. I do believe that several variations on the theme can be found in Salon's archives. Having given birth, I can empathize with Ms. Williams very common dilemma but I venture that anyone who's skimmed the lifestyle/health/beauty/fitness/parenthood section of the magazine stand, would also have a grasp. The key to a good essay on an oft written about topic, is when the writer can bring keen insight, original thought and/or new information to the piece...Ms. Williams' writing eludes on all counts and unfortunately, her style is also more suited to Cosmo than Salon. In the future, I hope Salon's editors will be more discerning when selecting their lifestyle stories. There is absolutely no reason why lifestyle articles can't be held to the same caliber of writing as found in Salon's excellent political, general news and sports sections.
Frankly, this is not a very good article. It's not that articles about parenting aren't interesting. I'm 23 and not yet a mother (though it's definitely in my life plan) and I do occasionally read about this topic. I support Salon's decision to publish articles about parenting and other "life"-related things.
But I LOATHE these diary-style essays in which a self-important woman blabbers about herself and only herself. Using personal experience in an article is fine, but please what about some journalism as well? Some medical facts? Some research?
Granted, this article isn't as bad as the truly inane pieces by Ayelet Waldman. But still, it's material for a blog and not for an allegedly reputable site like Salon. Making this the lead story is completely ridiculous.
And I don't mean the article. I'm amazed, amused, and disgusted at all the people who decided that the best antidote to what they saw as a whiney article was to write a letter to whine about it.
I didn't hate this article. I remember the first sex after my kid, many years ago, and at the time I felt very alone and very worried that things would never, ever be right again. But they were, and so was I. It's still not a bad thing to see that this is a common experience.
Much of the initial coverage about Fort Hood turned out to be wrong. Is there anything wrong with that?
The accountability imposed by another country for the CIA's kidnapping and torture reveals much about our own.
Fox News' morning show plays to type, talking about whether Muslims in the Army should face "special debriefings"
The survivor and author is upset about comparisons some on the right are making to genocide
Once seen as a lunatic fringe, reactionary anti-women groups are courting respectability
Salon headlines in your mailbox
