Letters to the Editor
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A Wonderful Surprise
As a social liberal who makes a point of listening to Limbaugh and reading publications like "National Review," "Weekly Standard," and "Washington Times," I'd like to congratualte Salon for this unpredictable and first-rate piece.
I very much like to know what conservatives are saying and I'm even more interested in paying attention to how they articulate their message.
I'm also increasingly troubled by what seems to be a growing tendency among liberals and leftists to seek out and applaud journalism that mirrors only their views.
Conservatives are winning in many arenas precisely because conservatives like O'Beirne pay close attention to what progressives, liberals, and leftists write, think, and say.
You may not like what conservatives do with this information, but you have to admit that they're not afraid of doing their homework and of taking care to formulate media-savvy responses to those ideas and opinions with which they disagree.
Once again, congratulations, Salon, on printing a very interesting piece. I hope to see more like it.
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Child Care
The idea that children are always better off with their mothers is simply not true. For the first 6 months, a baby is best off with their mother or a relative, if possible. Every woman in this country should get at least 6 months paid maternity leave (preferably 12 months). The government could fund it by eliminating the obcense billions wasted on the military, tax cuts for the rich and corporate welfare for oil and pharmaceutical companies. After the first year, a child wants to be with - guess - other children. After all, he or she still spends every evening and all weekend with his/her parents. That's a lot of time for bonding. My son (now 5) couldn't wait to get out every day to daycare. Staying home all day would have been a prison for him and for any grown woman (or man, for that matter). Every normal person needs to get out of the house and work or go to school during the day. You have a home for evenings and weekends - it is a nice retreat from the day's activities. How could anyone think it normal to stay in a house all day long? Men and women need to particpate in the work world and children need to go to school. The idea that any man or woman would actually want to stay at home and be dependent on a spouse is bizarre to me.
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Re: the cost of childcare
Part of it is the private market somewhat gouging two wage earner familes, but, a bigger part of it is that the earlier programs you mentioned often received generous government subsidies which allowed them to charge less. Those subsidies are history and a lot of those programs are gone, and as you state, they have mostly been replaced by expensive private services.
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There's an old country expression that says it's a bad idea to argue with an ass.
You won't change the ass's mind and it just makes you look stupid.
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childcare
but even if you do want your kid to socialize, and you're a SAHM... ever tried finding kids on the block for you kid to play with during the summer?
Guess what, most if not all of them are in summer programs because both parents are working in your neighborhood, so even though you're at home and have the time, you end up paying to put your kid in a program to be with other children because there are none in the neighborhood.
I think we're in a very sad state of affairs.
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Typical man?
>>) Men and women would share equally in household chores.
Not true. Negotiation is useless in this area>>
"i don't think that my husband is any better or worse than the majority of men out there... he's just a typical man."
These statements above just drive me crazy! Both my husband & I work equally hard at our jobs so why shouldn't our household tasks be shared? I would never stay with that type of "typical man" with who negotiation was useless.
Its not some feminist utopia. Its having a marriage that is a partnership where both parties have equal respect for one another. What he does at work is not more important that what I do. We have an equal drive to succeed.
So why should I "naturally" be stuck with the drudgery of housework??? Because I'm a woman? I know there are some people that love cleaning but I dont know many of them.
Just like any necessary but undesirable task, we split it as partners. I never excuse any behavior with the words "oh he's just a typical male" just like I would not want to be labeled a "typical woman".
And my husband is a much better cook than I am and its something he actually prefers doing too. I dont think that emasculates him or somehow factors negatively on me.
I am so sick of these stereotypes. Men & women act in a lot of ways because society tells them thats how they need to be. But each individual is his/her own person and cannot be lumped! The greatness of feminism is that it doesn't lump people together - it allows each of us to follow our desired path.
If one person wants to cook and clean all day, fine, great. This is your choice and I respect it. But dont tell me that this is my "natural" "female" path.
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I'm not impressed with the author
So Ms. O'Beirne blames the publicist for the patently false advertising on the cover of her book and "all" feminists for every other perceived evil in society while using virtually every logical fallacy to support what is essentially just her opinion, all the while living a contradictory life when compared to the bromides she preaches as gospel truth.
Yes, perhaps Ms. Traister could have done a better job with the interview, but at some point we have to remember that when you get into an argument with a pig, pretty soon you're both muddy and passers-by can't tell the difference.
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Please get someone else...
I just don't think Rebecca Traister asks the right questions about parenting and feminism. What about part-time professional jobs with benefits? Or job shares? What about Social Security for stay at home parents? O'Beirne's agenda laden omments about the lack of a wage gap make me nuts . Companies are willing to pay a premium for males because they are considered a better long term investment. No pesky maternity leave(s), less parental responsibility stuff. Men have WIVES to handle the business of the family. It's a huge advantage. I could have roasted that woman over the coals...Damned affluent women. Neither of you speak for me OR anyone I know.
When I talk to my right-wing friends I always say, "What liberal Elite? Where?" Then I read pie in the sky tripe like this and I have to say, "Oh, yeah. Them. But most of us aren't like that."