This is ridiculous. Crying at the end of a movie is one thing. Crying at work because someone was nasty to you is a whole different matter. This is childish beyond belief. The underlying message here is "My feelings are all that matter, and damn anyone who questions that." Guess what, Cecelie? Sobbing at the office makes a lot of people uncomfortable. It's disruptive. It's kind of controlling. It's juvenile. At some point, like it or not, you have to have logic, reason, maybe even a few facts, behind your point of view. Just letting it rip doesn't really cut it.

You're joking, right? Not crying in a professional setting is not a "male" value - it is the market stating its preference for reason over emotion (in particular, emotions that cause one to lose their self-control). Never mind, this has to be a joke. Good one!

I have seen a handful of people cry at work due to workplace stress. It is uncomfortable to witness and it is about as appropriate at work as passing gas audibly. It happens--but do you really have to share it with everyone?

In my eyes, it does not matter what lies between the legs of the person crying, the fact that they cannot "keep it together" in front of everyone really does make them look weak.

Why should one's gender dictate the appropriateness of emotional expression in the workplace?

Does that excuse workplace rage in men because they are men? Nope--it is still inappropriate and they should "keep it together".

Also very important to consider--if you are crying at work, maybe you should find a job that does not leave you in tears!

I was revolted when I saw first the New York Times article about this topic, and then Nasa's female commander on the Today show (10/18) saying that women should not express emotions on the job. It's not that I think we should be bawling openly at work. What bothered me the most was that the statements implied that (a) females are the only sex that experiences emotion, (b) that all people should be hesitant to express their feelings about things, lest they be taken for over-emotional nitwits, and (c) that women crying in public is such a big problem in the U.S. that it deserves mass media coverage from no less than three media outlets.

Is this what we need to be teaching young women? To restrain your true personality and talents so you can fit in with everyone else? How about teaching them the skills they need to reach the top rungs of the career ladder, if they choose to do so? Then there truly would be no need for tears.

Are most of your subscribers single professional women? I'm a gay man, to be sure full of every emotion within permissible and many not so, and I still find it hard to relate to the watered-down feminism of your story by Cecelie Berry.

What's that about women's unique emotional capacities? What's with the wonderful college women's studies prose ("It seems that when it comes to assessing whether women's emotions are a hindrance or, simply, a difference, we are still as divided as Janus:)?

There is such a thing as dignity. One can cry with dignity, that's for sure. But in the face of humiliation, in front of others who compete for your position and resources (the corporate world or the real world outside vegan communities, and I don't believe even in those) and at the moment have the upper hand, holding up one's face is the very last resort. Been there, (not) done that. Berry, a professional writer much knowledged about the real world, just wonders why middle-class professional women, the most oppressed of them all, cannot cry in the office. Please.

This has been one more of a long series of college sophomore-grade fluffy feminist articles you have published in the last weeks. If my threats are any valid, if salon.com keeps the nicy-feely empowerment thing going on, at the very least I won't renew my subscription. I will endure the ads if I have to endure these articles.

Ms. Berry's position that women should feel free to cry at work is the kind of advice that will ensure women continue to toil in lower-paying "female' positions where praise for having empathy and other 'soft' skills is a smokescreen for keeping them out of the highly rewarded management jobs they're too emotional to handle.

Emotional outbursts - crying, yelling, name-calling, slamming things, stomping - are not appropriate at work regardless of gender. Maintaining self-control is essential to being professional. Remaining calm keeps the focus on the issue and off yourself. It is true one cannot always control the rise of emotion, but if you find yourself near tears in the workplace there is only one correct response - excuse yourself until you have regained self-control. A person in the grip of emotion is unable to think or act in a rational, logical or productive way. Forcing peple to deal with you in that state is not acting like a professional - it's acting like the princess Ms. Berry's father apparently cherised her as.

Crying is not just a female thing. As a woman executive I have had the unpleasant experience of seeing both male and female employees cry. At best they came across as immature or otherwise unable to handle the adult stresses of the job; at worst they came across as manipulative, trying to move the focus off the issue at hand and onto their feelings in a childish bid for comfort over taking responsibility.

I have had the worst week at work. A few tears and calls to my therapist have kept me from walking out with no place to go.

I agree that everyone should be able to express emotion in the workplace however, I prefer to keep my breakdowns private. There are a lot of negative stereotypes that I'd prefer not to deal with.

I totally agree with this article. In fact, I wrote a poem on this subject a few years ago:

LET US CRY

Middle-aged women�K

We cry for the world

In ways no others can.

For reasons no others understand.

For the pain, the fear,

The incredible beauty of life.

For all the goodbyes said,

Knowing they will be forever.

For hope, and despair.

For love, and anger.

For needs fulfilled at last,

And needs not understood.

Forgiveness and regret.

Searching, and only perhaps finding.

Fumbling and blinded,

Desperate for meaning.

Don��t tell us we need pills

So we can stay someone

We no longer are.

The world needs our tears.

Honor our role,

Our depth of feeling.

Who knows what wisdom

Our cronehood may bring?

�� Rose M. Berkowitz

April 19, 2001