It may be healthier for people to express their emotions, but the honesty and power conveyed by politicians crying was due to its

rarity. If politicians cried every time something emotional happened, people would be as cynical and dismissive of that as they are of normal politician speeches. Those outbursts seemed real because that would normally be suppressed.

As a mother, I've noticed that my tears can quell the intense rivalry between my two sons; they quickly join forces to comfort me.

Plus, I love the drama.

Does C.B. not see what's wrong with these paragraphs ? By manipulating her sons this way she's teaching them that women are dishonest manipulative emotional fakers. Poor kids. I wonder if she will think it so cute when they refuse emotional intimacy with their girlfriends/wives.

While I'm all for public displays of emotion, Ms. Berry seeks to neatly sidestep one side-effect of women crying in the workplace: sometimes it can be used to manipulate the actions of those around them.

I've seen both women and men cry at work for very good reasons: loss of a loved one, exhaustion, severe stress and unhappiness, and being fired.

But I have also seen tears used as a way of winning a point in an informal business meeting. I have also seen an incompetent manager burst into tears when confronted by patient employees who sought to meet with her about their concerns. As a result of her emotional scene, she ended up working at her job much longer than she had demonstrated ability, much to the general misery of everyone else in the office.

The fact is, as a man I hate seeing women cry if I think that I've caused it. I think that most men share this quality. And some women make use of this to win points in the workplace, eliciting shame from men and an automatic, even if undeserved, sympathy from other women.

So yes, open up and cry where and when you want. Chances are, I'll be sympathetic and do what I can to comfort you. But not if it's just a grown-up version of the frustration you felt as a child when you couldn't get your own way.

Is this for real?

Perhaps there are women who use tears to manipulate people and get their own way, but those are people who generally will manipulate people by whatever means they have. Why should they ruin tears for the rest of us?

For a lot of people, like me, tears are the natural, honest response to something touching or emotional. When one of my friends tells me the story behind a tattoo that's particularly meaningful for her, I can't help but feel those emotions myself and start to tear up. I cry because I let myself empathize; and doesn't our world of corruption and capitalism and greed need a little more of that?

I work with a group of men -- none of whom are married, (I believe being married has a 'humanizing' effect on males), in a fast-paced, high-stress business, trading stocks.. I'm a wonan, and the only black person there. I get along great with everyone, there is no racism, and no divide --these men are equally scornful of anyone they percieve to be weak; their favorite word is "putz", and anything else they feel necessary to the occasion. I am not weak. Ergo, I get respect. I'd like to see the effect it would have if I were to cry whenever it suited me. It's all well and good for a writer to advise women to cry when they see fit -- that is my dream profession by the way -- however, that is an indulgence which should suit the time and place, and in many instances, it does not.

>>As a mother, I've noticed that my tears can quell the intense rivalry between my two sons; they quickly join forces to comfort me.

>>Plus, I love the drama.

Here, in a nutshell, is why my company discourages emotional outbursts, especially among our female colleagues.

Far too often the crying is an attempt at manipulation, either the crying allows a woman to avoid responsibility for failing in a task or to engender sympathy or any number of other desired outcomes. I do not manipulate them, and I would like them to not attempt to manipulate me. In my workplace, honesty is paramount.

This is not about being cold and emotionless, but simply expressing yourself appropriately as an adult and professional. Just as I (as a man, and a bit high-wired man at times) cannot go around shouting things and acting aggressively, women must in turn modulate their own behavior until we reach a happy medium where work progresses.

I don't think anyone where I work would begrudge a woman (or a man) from expressing real, heartfelt emotions. Too often though, and this seems to happen with the women more than the men, the emotions serve only as an artificial shield to avoid responsibility and manipulate their audience.

I agree with Ms. Berry that both women and men should be allowed to cry in public without fear.

HOWEVER, I strongly disagree with the notion of shedding tears left and right for the sake of The Country or whatever drama she is "enjoying" at the moment. As with most things, there is a limit.

As a one-time manager of an office full of both women and men the crying jags women launched into were just as off-putting as the aggressive behavior the men were capable of. Both were oftentimes devices used to distract from the problem at hand.

I realize we are all only human, and do human things, but to bang the drum about it?

Well, it brings to the eyes is what it does.

Crying, like any other expression of emotion, is not a simple thing to categorize. People can and will cry for sadness, fear, joy, anger, etc. That is precisely what renders it at best neutral as a means of communication.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with crying as a means of emotional release, but it begs the question, now what? If crying inspires or motivates the person to accomplish, communicate and even relax, then it's emotion well spent. If it merely serves as a tool to intimidate or manipulate it becomes no better than a calculated tantrum.

People who have problem with seeing tears on a friend or coworker need to develop the patience to wait for the aftermath and rejoin the person at this juncture, without needing to feel disgust, fear, or even sympathy as a response the the tears.