How old do you have to be before you have earned the right to do what you want? To treat yourself with the same love and respect that you would give other people?

Give yourself permission to have a little fun. You've been a good girl long enough.

It's clear you won't go overboard, or start neglecting your family or clients. You are a hard worker but you need a little time to play. All work and no play...you've heard the saying.

Playing music is your play time.

Tell your husband and anyone else who asks you where this is going that it's none of their business.

This is for you, it doesn't have to go anywhere, and you deserve it.

Oh, that easy........When you're DEAD! ....Get serious; go to www.guitarprinciples.com. learn how to practice and enjoy.........

...envisoning you taking a break from corporate culture to strum your strings, but this isn't just about the guitar. Might your fantasies be about lost youth or freedom, which you seem to have very little of? You don't have to be good at the guitar, perhaps a goal could be to learn one particular song and play with a group. Sorry to be preachy, I'm another mom-worker-middle ager who should be doing many other things besides perusing Salon---but you really do need to take care of your health and overall well being and get some more time for yourself as well as some family time. Maybe you could exercise together--hike or bike--kill two birds with one stone. Maybe hike to a mountain top with your family and play the guitar there, three birds, now that's multi-tasking for a buzy lady!! Remember, you are fine just as you are. You have a right to be here. You are loved. You are part of the universe. Perhaps think these thoughts as you strum the guitar. Good luck.

Listen as you play. What part sounds good to you? Do you like the droning bass, or the ringing top strings? Do you like fast rhythm? Or maybe you have a gentle strum going, which makes for a nice pulse?

And what about your voice? Can you make people laugh or smile with a quirky sound in your voice? Or are you incredibly loud? Maybe you sound like Maude? or Snow White?

The thing is, you don't have to do all of it great, but if you can find one little thing that makes you unique, you'll have more fun and you'll be entertaining. But you got to learn to love that little thing that's unique about you, that you do well.

And don't wait to Google the following: ""Dimming of the Day" tab Richard Thompson" (or maybe Bonnie Raitt). You'll be directed to web sites of uncertain legality which will have chords of uncertain accuracy. Play along, and try to find a way to put that unique thing you do in there.

P.S. - I, too, have tried to sound like Thompson for many years, and got the privilege of interviewing him for a major website.

practical advice: play along with recordings that you like. I'm a marginal sight-reader, but I can play almost anything by ear. When you do this, you are generally playing with good, or at least better musicians and it will force you to not get hung up on the bitty mistakes.

You simply have to do something about that commute. That's ten hours a week wasted. That is more than enough time to turn a decent life into an unworkable one. I say this from experience. That commute is an unreasonable burden, completely independent of the guitar issue.

Figure out how to take the train, and use the time on the train to do something productive. Practice guitar on the train. Or practice law on the train: take your laptop and get some work done, then cut your work day short by an equivalent amount. Bike to the train station, so at least some of that time counts as exercise. Arrange a telecommute day (more, if you can get them). Use your imagination on how to deal with that time more creatively.

are worth doing badly, according to Chesterton. I just happen to apply that more to being a crappy lawyer. Fortunately, I'm a pretty good guitar player.

My guess is that you're pretty hard on yourself anyway, and that you're really not that crappy of a guitar player (I am really that crappy of a lawyer, on the other hand, and I feel fine).

That was very sweet of you to say.

playing the autoharp? It's not exactly the same as a guitar--the range is higher, for one thing. It's also not nearly as versatile as a guitar-you can't improvise too well and make up your own chords. But it sounds like you just want to play fairly standard chords, and the nice thing about an autoharp is that it has the chords labeled for you--all you have to do is press the button down for the chord you want and then strum.

Okay, you got my philosophical response above; now for the practical stuff.

1. Regular practice. If you play daily, even for 15 minutes, you will improve.

2. Someone said you should play the worst guitar you can find. Bad idea. It just makes learning that much harder and more discouraging. You don't need top of the line, but you do need a guitar that is a size comfortable for you(not often a problem for men, but often is for women.) Many women are more comfortable with a parlor size or grand concert than a dreadnought. Also, good action is important. Strings too high off the neck make your job much harder. This can often be adjusted(but make sure to find someone who knows what they're doing.)

3. Having either a travel guitar that is easy to transport, or a second guitar that you can just leave at work is a great idea. There are several travel guitars available that won't break the bank and are light and easy to carry with you.

4. Acoustic Guitar magazine, if you haven't discovered it, is a great resource, as is their website. (I'm not affiliated with them in any way.)

5. There are now dozens of lessons available on DVD, for every level of player and every imaginable musical interest. Homespun Tapes is a good starting place. I've found these to, in some ways, be even better than a live instructor. As in, you can play them again and again, repeating parts that you're having trouble with. There are lessons available by some of the best players on the planet.