I hate to sound negative, but if you are still at the beginner stage after a year of lessons, I doubt you will ever learn to play the guitar. My brother taught himself to play both the guitar and the piano in a very short time. He plays beautifully. It was easy for him; he just has natural talent.

If I were you, I would spend my lunch hour at the gym. Getting in good shape physically can make you feel great. And it is so much better than struggling with something at which you are obviously not very good.

I am also a lawyer, and at about the same ages as you are now, I took up hammer dulcimer. The nice thing about this instrument - which is the great great great grandmother/father to the Piano, is that it does not hurt to play it. If you like instruments such as the harp, you will love the beautiful sound of the hammer dulcimer. Also, as you played Piano, you will find this instrument a bit more intuitive for you.

I have been doing this now for 10 years - and while not a brilliant player - I am decent. I am sure if I had time to practice I would be much much better.

So now, to check out the sounds - go to youtube and just put in the term "hammer dulcimer" and see what pops up.

I believe that there is a "right" instrument for each of us - its finding it that can be difficult.

I learned to play the trumpet in 5th grade. It was hard at first, but I eventually got it. At age 40 I decided to fulfill a 20 year old dream and learn to play the piano. I could make it through the piano books, but I never really "got" it. I think there are neuron connections between brain and fingers that are more easily made at a young age. I gave up the piano when I realized I was never going to get past the basics, and my joints began to hurt from the practicing I was doing to try to overcome the road block. For me, the 40's have been accepting that I was never going to be a rock star or movie star and allowing myself to take pride in the things I do do well. I also allow myself to enjoy the talents of real artists of all stripes and be grateful for the efforts they made to raise their skills to that level.

My advice is to keep playing as long as it is fun, but don't feel like you are a failure if you don't make it past the chord level.

Seriously, man, you need to chill a bit when it comes to parenting questions. You sound like the LW confessed to child abuse or something, and your reaction is way disproportionate. Do you really think a good mother is one who subsumes her entire identity to her children and does nothing else with her life? Do you think it makes for a happy person, mother, or family if one person bears the brunt of everyone else having the freedom to follow their interests and skills? My mother loves to sing and play the piano and it is a love that has continued through all aspects of her life. She taught me how to play and all her kids how to appreciate good songs. She now sings in her church choir and continues to take pleasure and relaxation from music. Would you have told her back-in-the-day that those interests was time-squandering "crap that will mean nothing... in 20 years?" Your assignment for the day is to (re) read THE FEMININE MYSTIQUE, and see just what happens to women who are forced to drop every single thing that makes them a person in order to chase the unattainable "good mother" role. TFM's take on this is as true today as it ever was.

Please read this post below (forgot to add to my last post)...Practice 10-15 minutes a day and live your life the other 23.75 hours...

http://www.musicafter50.com/practice/

Dear LW,

Please take a look at this website:

http://www.musicafter50.com

And this page:

http://www.musicafter50.com/share-your-story/

And this page, which I just posted minutes ago!

http://www.musicafter50.com/2009/07/contributing-your-voice/

Best,

L.

I wasn't very good, so I quit...is this helpful advice?

Incidentally, I think that one of the reasons I got through law school with my sanity more or less intact is because I would go to the music room to practice after lectures. It gave my mind a break, gave me an emotional outlet, and probably saved me a lot of money on therapy. My classmates were a lot more stressed out about law school than I was. Now, when I listen to the music I wrote during my law school years, I can hear the stress and worry in some of the pieces - but it was all released in the music rather than bottled up in my cardiovascular system.

Law is a very stressful profession - you know it far better than I do. Parenting is also very stressful at times. You need some kind of stress release, and music is perfect for that. Lots of lawyers take up drinking as their stress release (I saw that in some of my law school classmates); lots of them take up even more self-destructive habits. 10 minutes of music a day is nothing compared to what you could be doing. And the nice thing about the guitar, as opposed to the piano, is that you can play it anywhere. Put it in your car and practice for 15 minutes on your lunch hour. Practice for 15 minutes after you leave work, just sitting in your car in the parking lot. Stop by a quiet park on your way home and play for 15 minutes. Go outside after your kids are asleep and play for 15 minutes.

Another thing - find a music-making group. One of my friends works at a high-tech firm, and some of her coworkers get together on a regular basis at one coworker's house, bring guitars and other musical instruments, and play and sing. Some of them are expert players, some are beginners. My friend is somewhat intermediate. No one cares. I came to one of these once, and there was no piano and I didn't know any of the songs, so they gave me a hand drum, and I provided percussion. I was pretty bad at it. No one cared. The point was to have fun making music, not to compete. No one was aiming for Carnegie Hall. We were just trying to make noise together, and it was good noise. Some of the folks brought their kids, and the kids were singing along - and I thought it was a wonderful thing for the kids to see their parents having fun making music.

One more thing - in some of the relationships I've been in, my significant other was very jealous of the piano and of the role that music played in my life. It does tend to happen.

Sorry to overwhelm you with responses. As you can see, this is a subject that is rather close to my heart. But I can't bear to see a born musician - and you clearly are one - give up music. Please keep playing.