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guys, the LW is a shallow 29-year-old. she's not a mother, nor a stepmother. and yet she's still mature enough to say in the letter that she's not ready to be one, either.
at least she has the honesty to admit this . . . unlike her boyfriend, who is already a father but seems monumentally unsuited and uninterested in being one.
so yeah, the LW isn't anyone's idea of the ideal stepmom . . . but I think she's doing the admirable ADULT duty of stepping back and saying, "you know what? I don't think I'm ready to do this job properly, the way it deserves to be done." so why don't we let her take cary's advice, meaning back out now, and be grateful for the rest of her life (and theirs!) that she was mature enough to at least ask, first, whether or not she was ready to take on a lifelong commitment of such magnitude.
most of us have doubts every day of our lives. not all of us are wise enough to recognize when these doubts are truly big and valid, and to take action to if so. let her make the right choice and give her a break.
