This letter is associated with the following article:
Letters
Monday, January 12, 2009 12:00 AM

The two-boyfriend problem

I miss the one I left, but I don't want the one I left him for!

Read other letters about this article

  • Monday, January 12, 2009 02:07 PM

    re: Amerigo and (trust)funded grad students

    I think it was me who first mentioned trust funds in this thread. OK, maybe I mis-spoke, but what I was really meaning was that the attitude of many of the confused graduate students who write in to Cary suggests a lack of familiarity with the working world, that in turn suggests that probably they have a financially supportive family.

    Oh, I know EXAAAAAACTLY what you mean. I will elaborate further. These are people who:

    - grew up in a pleasant suburb of a major city

    - went directly from high school to college to grad school

    - have never held a real job ("internships" at megacorps don't count)

    - don't, and have never, meaningfully interacted with people outside of their own middle-, upper middle-, or upper class social group (they may have collected coats for the homeless or poor, but have never talked to anyone who is or was)

    - have never personally known adversity

    - if push came to shove, even if they aren't trust funded, they could turn to their families for support

    My partner, who just finished his grad degree, went to school with a number of such people, some of whom were indeed creating similar romantic intrigues for themselves (boredom? to avoid having to come up with a dissertation topic? some combination of the above? who knows!). The older ones who'd worked and/or been kicked around a little, were often interesting people with whom I genuinely enjoyed spending time.

Most Active Letters Threads

523

The crazy, irrational beliefs of Muslims

Tom Friedman explains the real problem: stupid Muslims think the U.S. is about war and aggression.
417

The face of rotted Washington

Evan Bayh demands more debt-financed war - fought by others - while boasting that he's a stern "deficit hawk."
185

Bigotry wins in Switzerland

By voting to ban the construction of minarets, Switzerland apes the most extreme intolerance in the Muslim world
129

Facebook, the mean girls and me

At 34 years old, I finally feel like a popular seventh-grader. How sad is that?
103

Polanski moves from jail to ski chalet

The rapist director is granted bail, and one of his most vocal apologists celebrates

View all »

Letters Help

Currently in Salon