You say your boyfriend's friends aren't nice to him--This is telling. If he lets them treat him badly, then he's afraid of them. He might be bothered by their treatment of you, but he can't do anything about it because he just doesn't have the stones. Correct?

The way I see it, you're faced with a choice. Either you can accept this weakness or you can't. If you need someone who will always defend your honor, then this guy is wrong for you. I'm sure there are lots of old-fashioned, chivalrous types who would be outraged at this story, who would break a guy's jaw for you. Still, chivalrous types can get bossy. They'll have standards of their own for you to live up to. Do you want that?

You say you "didn't have rights" because you "weren't in a proper relationship", you apparently are living with someone you aren't married to, and you're hanging out with your boyfriend's guy friends. All of this is a testament to hard-won feminist freedom. But as everyone knows, with freedom comes responsibility. I think you should try being the strong one, the defender, or whatever you want to call that traditional male role.

Try saying things like this:

"Get your dirty hands off me, [expletive]."

"Sure we'll get it on, if you two f*k each other in the a* for us."

And try defending your boyfriend too! He obviously can't do it himself. But I don't know if that's really a dumping offense. I don't think it would be for me.

I have been fended off, too. At times, when I had ambitions, certain women have fended me off. I know how this works from both sides.

Also, I have left. When people were too kooky, I just left. I am not the only one. Most people learn this over their years. This is human nature, but life is not 100% tough. You need not put up with the 90% nasty people. Some people are 90% polite, loving, fun. You can find them.

I, Timbuktom, wrote that maybe the LW is crying wolf. (You can read my posts.)

1. Dear Letter Writer, if this guy lets his friends squeeze you, and if that displeases you, leave. That should be obvious.

2. In real life, have you not encountered this situation before? Cryin' out loud, I know plenty of attrative girls and women. They all develop ways of fending off this stuff. It's not just your boyfriend and his pals, it's human nature. The hicky, rude side of human nature. The best defense is to let the offender feel tiny, powerless, and rude. I myself have fended off girls and boys in this manner.

3. I repeat: If you do not like these people, find other people.

A difficult concept to grasp is WHY this woman would stay with such a guy for a year?

This seems to be a theme. Women choose asshole guys, they stay with them no matter how they are treated, then spend their days complaining.

Advice: He and his friends are lowlifes. Walk away.

Is that really so difficult to get?

Damnit girl, you need now like ASAP some kickboxing lessons or karate or some therapy or something! You didn't think you had any "rights" to not be groped by some guy cause he happens to be your boyfriends pal? You think your rights as a human being go away when you're dating? What the fuck are you from some backwards ass country that think a woman is a step down from a dog?

You get assaulted and don't say anything, you wait for weeks to bring up some jackass thing one of his friends did in the middle of a fight? Why, to win the fight? That is so passive aggressive it isn't even funny.

Okay there lady, I don't know if you were abused, if you are incapable of saying no, or what the hell your problem is but you need help, immediately. Your reactions are not normal, you have no self defense mechanism and you need one! This is not to say his friends aren't sexist jerks and possibly predators, or maybe just your garden variety jock douchebags but these are the people your man has chosen and he does not stick up for you and you seem unwilling to stand up for yourself.

Once you get that help, seriously, not a joke, you need some self-defense classes, some self-esteem therapy, you will not have any problem dropping this weak simpering fool you call a boyfriend. This man boy is not a good partner, he will not be someone you can count on. He is somewhat like these friends and I bet if you overheard what he said when you weren't around it'd make your skin crawl.

Dumping your dipshit boyfriend won't help you at the moment because you'll just pick a new douchebag, you need help lady. Seriously, now.

Look, I know you're married. And I know that you love your wife--at least you claim to. So...if someone "accidentally" or "in admiration" brushed her breast, squeezed her buttocks, she should be OK with that?

Where is the sensible, caring Timbuktom who usually posts, and what have you done with him?

This is all reminding me of a few years ago. I was already in my late 40's, but (no brag, just fact) looked a lot younger. I was at a bar in the small town of my ILs summer home, and a creepy old drunk was "accidentally" bumping into people. But only women. And only their breasts. He did it to me, once.

I looked at him, steely eyed, and said, "Touch me again, and I will kick you in the balls. HARD." He suddenly became sober enough to avoid my breasts. And every other woman's, too.

Timbuktom, WTF?

No, it's NOT alright if she would have enjoyed it if someone else did it. It's NOT ALL RIGHT. She doesn't want that specific person to touch her in that way, and she has the right not to be touched without her consent.

Would it be all right with you if a man caressed your thigh? What do you mean, no? You'd be okay if your girlfriend/wife (assuming you have one) did that. You'd be okay if Anna Kournakova did that. So you should be just hunky-dory with you that this man did the same thing.

Get the point yet? Sheesh.