I think Cary planted this letter to test the patience of his readers. Please.

Cary: Funny, I read that letter thoroughly and saw nothing about writing a screenplay. Don't assume that because you're writing, that everyone else wants to do that. How do you know the LW isn't interested in directing, producing, or the more technical side of filmmaking?

LW: I'm sorry you had that experience, but I thought it was pretty well known that the film world is full of spoiled brats looking to unload their frustrations on the help. Like you, I thought it would be great to work in the entertainment industry. But unlike you, I knew about the crazy streak, so after a few months I threw my hands in the air and said to hell with it. Life's too short to drink bad wine, as the poet said, and there's plenty of work around that not only pays better than that industry (it's AMAZING how friggin' cheap they are, even the really big studios) but doesn't involve getting screamed at or getting things thrown at you. Cary's right in that regard: forget Hollywood and go find something you really like to do. Believe it or not, Tinseltown is not the only place they're making movies anymore!

Backpack for a year if you can. Or maybe a month if that is more in your budget. But if you can't, just go home. You're never gonna get this guy to leave LA for you if closer home is where you want to be once you start having babies. (I mean, if you eventually want to).

Get your teaching certificate and teach. Substitute teach for awhile then get your credential in whatever age group you enjoy the most, in whichever endeavor (art, english, etc.) you want (get a secondary certification as a backup).

I taught for awhile, among many many jobs, it was my favorite. If I had waited out the early years when the pay was bad now I would be making decent pay at it.

As a teacher, you will have opportunities to travel. Entire summers to traipse around the continent of your choice. You can go on teacher retreats with other teachers, or lead groups of students, or just save your cash and go solo.

There aren't many opportunities to get paid for your art and maintain a steady income and have months off at a time.

So, teach. Substitute for awhile to see if you might like it, try out different age groups and school districts and subjects, and go for it.

You will be great at it.

Kidding, I don't have an assistant (coffee's kind of cold though), and when the day comes that I need one I really hope I am civil. Yes, the entertainment industry is full of horrible bosses who yell. I've been yelled at a number of times, my friends who made their start as agents assistants have stories that are truly horrible.. But there are also quite a few decent people in it as well and working with them can be heaven.

The Problem is that there is too much stress and too much craziness to deal with if all you want is "a career in film" or "a career in entertainment." You have to know what you want. Carrie is right in that if you really want to be in film you need to know exactly what kind of film work do you want to do. You say you want to be creative, but what does that mean to you? Do you want to create characters(actors and writers do this), stories (writers and directors), images (directors and DP's)? Maybe you just feel the need to express emotion in a way that is communicative - the "biz" may not be the best place for that, that's the perview of real indy films, avante guarde films, experimental theater etc etc.

If you know what you want to do, then and only then can you start a path, and only then can you withstand those entry level jobs (I spent a year dubbing 3/4 and beta tapes) because you know why you are doing what you are doing.

Now it may be you are finding you really do not want any of this. If you don't have a passionate need to make film or TV, I'd say get out now, the internet may kill the whole thing anyway. There are many other creative outlets (just about all of them require less financing than getting a film made.) But liking things that are creative and wanting to be involved with creative things is not the same as being a creator. To some extent there needs to be a certain level of compulsion, a need to express or create something that will drive you forward.

OK, I probably sound like I'm beating up on LW so In fairness I should point out it took me years to figure this stuff out. I was much older than LW.

Is there something you want to create? Do you know exactly what it is? Make a plan and create it. if you do that, no one will care that during the day you have been warming someone's coffee.

And as for your values being out of line with those around you. If you stick around, you may find that some of the best people in film actually share a number of your values.

Not everyone spends their nights doing blow off a stripper's ass.

LW: Examine closely the process that built your expectations of the "film industry" to the point where they were so far from the reality you experienced -- a reality that everyone I know in the industry understands, and moreover would have been happy to explain to you 2 years ago.

This might sting a bit, but I think you have self-knowledge and really do understand that whatever your process was, it seriously mislead you.

And so you need to be very, very sure that you aren't applying that same process to building your expectations of your "year at home saving" or your East Asian backpacking extravaganza.

You need to be sure of these things, because on the evidence of your letter, your ideas on how to progress your current relationship have been built by the same unrealistic process. I think you actually understand this, deep down.

So take a good, hard look at how your expectations get built. And then act on the conclusions you come to about bettering that process. And then decide what to do.

Good luck.