Letters to the Editor
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Plant MORE oleanders
Oh, as for oleanders being poisonous, they are also everywhere... (at least, wherever they are able to grow, like in Scottsdale).
But seriously, of all the ideas presented, I like best the idea of planting oleanders in a row in front of HER house. Preferably while she's gone, but maybe not. Be nice about it. Tell her you just don't want to look at her house anymore-- perhaps her windows are causing you a glare, or perhaps you take offense at the particular color of mauve she painted her porch mailbox? Something. Whatever it is. Just plant a row of oleanders in front of her house. THEN let it go.
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The omitted column
So can someone PLEASE at least tell me the topic of this mysteriously excised letter from today?
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I liked greenbriar's post on this letter
Greenbriar posted:
"the woman who planted the oleanders is miserable. . .
"Smile and wave when you see her. The more that woman thinks she can get away with things like what she did, the more audacious she's going to get. . . her level of cunning will be directly proportional to how much resistance she thinks she'll encounter. I notice she already assumes she has your support. If she gets self-righteous enough, starts to get high on being the voice of reason and being in charge of the neighborhood, she'll end up doing something to get herself hauled away in handcuffs."
So tru. Let her karma unfold unimpeded.
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the removed letter
. . . had to do with keeping unwanted guests out of a swimming pool.
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the purloined letter
Not to continue to hijack this conversation away from the oleander problem (which I agree is difficult -- respecting the elderly woman's wishes vs. teaching the annoying neighbor lady a lesson), but I'll bet that the swimming pool entry was seen by the cousin who was using the pool. I had a friend who wrote a letter to Cary about her boyfriend, and one of her boyfriend's friends saw it, noticed a few similar details, and reported straight back to him, after which he confronted my friend about it. It was a mess, especially given that the letter was about potential break-up!
Anyway, if the cousin DID see it, well, good.
As to the lack of permission, I'm not sure I buy it. It's pretty clear on Salon where you send a letter for publication and where you don't. So I'm guessing the LW was Found Out - whether by her husband or her cousin, I'm not sure, but I'll bet she also didn't like the evisceration of her husband in the comments.
Either way, I hope it keeps the cousins out of the pool!
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the missing letter wasn't about the swimming pool...
it was written by a woman who was unhappily married to a short man.
the swimming pool letter is still up.
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Don't let your evil oleander-planting neighbor off the hook!
If your bitchy oleander-planting neighbor has the audacity to bully your elderly neighbor - and that's exactly what she did -who is she going to target next? Worse, what else is she going to do to your elderly neighbor?
Don't let this bitch get away with it. Her actions affect your property values too - who wants to buy into a neighborhood with someone like that for a neighbor? Talk to the son about replanting the oleanders in a better location. See if your community has a group that repaints & repairs houses for seniors & sign your elderly neighbor up. Find some kid to do yardwork for her & pay him yourself if you have to - you can always tell her he's doing it towards his merit badge or something if she doesn't want to accept charity. Talk to your other neighbors as well and ask them to help - chances are they're of the situation with both the bitch across the street and the elderly woman next door and don't like what's going on either. Better yet, call the police, explain the problem and ask for their advice - even if they do nothing at least they will have been made aware of what's going on there in case there are problems in the future. They may even be able to offer some suggestions for other senior citizen resources in your community that may be able to help your neighbor maintain her property.
But at least do something. Someone has to stand up to this elder-abusing bully before she plants again. Who better to do so than you?
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Um, no ...
The swimming pool post is still up. The removed entry was a hysterical letter from a young twenty-something girl who married the first guy she slept with and who she married at the ripe age of 18 or 19, only to find herself, five years later, madly attracted to tall, handsome men. This led her to discover that her husband is not only short, but unacceptably round about the middle. So she spends all her time daydreaming about these other men and is embarrassed to introduce her adoring, wonderful, perfect-in-every-other-way husband to her co-workers because she's ashamed that he will reflect poorly on her to her well-married peers. Oh, and she acts out on her unhappiness by verbally abusing her loving DH.
If you can imagine, most of the responses to this letter were full of outrage and were downright hilarious. Sorry to those who missed it.
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idfjiosdlfj
It's the explanation that's posted at the top of the swimming pool entry. I'd say "go look at it," but someone posted it (the explanation already).
It was *really* funny. One of my favorites, I think. I'm not sure what the deal with the explanation was, though. It said something about Salon not having permission to reprint the letter. I'm not sure why one would write an advice columnist and not expect the letter to be published.
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couple of suggestions
Keep them trimmed. Go out in the middle of the night and keep them trimmed to the point that the neighbor can still see the house. LOL. Or, go out in the middle of the night and poison them. A little Roundup will do the trick. LOL.
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More on Mrs. Short Husband
It's also worth mentioning that Cary's response was particularly atypical and (to me) quite funny, telling the writer that her husband was indeed at fault for refusing to grow a few measly inches for her, and suggesting that she chain him to the treadmill in their bedroom to take care of the pot-belly problem.
There was also something about divorcing him and taking the house, because he was probably too short to appreciate it anyway.
I hope I'm not violating anyone's rights by paraphrasing the response to this unauthorized letter. If so, my apologies, Mrs. Short Husband!