Letters to the Editor
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I don't understand
Why the LW says there isn't much they can do about the neighbor's upkeep? How bad could it be? Some trimming, fertilizing, edging and mowing? It might not end up the best yard in the neighborhood, but it would be acceptable and not embarass the owner. Why can't she enlist the asshole neighbor and others to help with the upkeep? If her elderly neighbor keeps apologizing, she must be willing to accept a little yard assistance and wish it wasn't the way it currently is. Frankly I am capable of and in fact do all of my yard work, but would be thrilled if someone offered to take it over.
Maybe the house itself has too many issues for the neighborhood to take on, but the yard? Pitch in, fertilize it when you do your own, mow it when you do your own, add some shrubs or whatever plantings the owner likes - as long as you include her in the deicision, put your energy into HELPING. Otherwise, mind your own business COMPLETELY.