Letters to the Editor
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@KStone
A man who is interested in his space would not have encouraged her to leave stuff there in the first place. A real man would meet her half way. Boy needs to man up.
I agree that she should not have left things there. I do NOT agree that it is all of her fault. HE encouraged her to leave things there, HE wants her to schlep stuff. That's just asshattish. HE needs a brick to the head.
Asking her to stay without the key is teasing. The only way to deal with that is to walk away. No, she should not have left her stuff there without a key.
I had friends who clued me in on the "never leave stuff at his house" thing. If you break up and you have stuff at his house, you either have to forget it or you come off as the stalking girlfriend just to get your stuff back. Some people are not as lucky in their friendships as I have been. I have been blessed with some truly wise friends.
If he didn't want to give a key, he shouldn't encourage LW to leave stuff there, and he needs to haul his butt across town half of the time. If he's not interested in hauling his tail across town, he needs to shut up and not issue manipulative threats. If he's not that interested period, he needs to man up and break up.
I had boyfriends drive across town to see me. I had one drive two hours one way for several years to see me. My friends all had this, too. We would never have schlepped stuff. But that was a different time. This dude seems weak to me, and his behavior seems very immature. Not controlling, just immature and self-involved, like a commodity man who thinks he's all that or a high maintence woman who thinks men should kiss her feet and call her queen. Both types are a little too entitled and need to be left alone.