Letters to the Editor
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Most Women go through this...
I and all my girlfriends could give you examples of what amounts to the same thing - we care for a guy, he supposedly cares for us. Things aren't quite what we'd like them to be, but "he's got problems" or "issues" and we just need to be respectful and patient until he works it out. Right?
Wrong. Once I realized I was making excuses for men (legit or not) and not putting my own needs first, I realized what losers they all were. (Even if essentailly nice men who meant well, they were ultimately a waste of my time. You man doesn't even sound "essentially" well-meaning.) I stopped being the "nice, understanding girl" and to have little patience for being let down. I stopped saying "I understand why you can't give me X" and I began saying, "that's not my problem". This will clear out the riff-raff right quick.
My initial gut feelings always turned out to be right. I saved a lot of time on losers and - actually - met my husband. (When all I was looking for was a healthy relationship. But I knew, cause I never had to say "I understand why you can't...") If you don't feel you're getting what you deserve, then you're not. Make that the yardstick by which you judge your man and you can't go wrong.
Next time you're there, take all your when you leave and stop answering his calls (if indeed he calls). Say nothing more to him ever again besides "figure it out". I promise you, he already knows.