Letters to the Editor
-
@ deering
Yeh, I get what you're saying, I agree. What I was trying to convey was that, when we get our hearts broken too often there's a whole raft of pop psychologists ready to tell us why we were idiots to let it happen in the first place.
My feeling is that the LW is rather young, and ya know no one teaches you how to conduct relationships, etc, and it can be confusing at first when you're just trying to sort things thru and do the best you can.
None of us is perfect, and my bet is that there are loads of people in fully functional relationships who have poor self-esteem, lack of boundaries, etc -- somehow they just bump along together.
I hope I'm expressing this right -- i think our culture has come very far away from the idea of 'self-sacrifice' and 'be the first to say you're sorry' in relationships in favor of "When you're in love, make sure all your needs are met! Make sure the guy is perfect, otherwise, YOU DESERVE MORE!"
Deering, again, I agree about people having the right boundaries, etc, I just think there is too much emphasis these days on people undergoing a complete psychological overhaul when relationships end, as tho there were something dreadfully wrong with them.
(hope I explained that right...)