Letters to the Editor
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Get your own space when you visit
We also have in-laws who come from Europe to the US for a yearly visit, loads of kids in tow. My advice is to get your own place. Hock the car, whatever you have to do... get your own efficiency apartment for the duration. Around the corner from Mom and Dad if you have to.
My husband is an introvert. He's a well-behaved, well-socialized introvert, but being a guest in someone's house (especially my parents') sends him over the edge. Yet if he takes a magazine and disappears off to bed early, it's perceived as a slight. No... he's just OVERLOADED and needs a break. I completely understand.
Being around a cranky small baby, for anyone but that baby's immediate household, is very difficult for all.
I would... let your sister and brother's comments go. You've already done what you can (move to another country), you don't see them often, and focus on your relationship with your parents. And get your own place when you visit.
Good luck.