Letters to the Editor
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Separate lodgings and shorter stays.
The idea of having separate lodgings is a good idea. That way the baby can be up all night and the husband sleep in antisocially. Plus you don't need to interact if and when you don't feel like it.
Rent a car, too, if that makes it easier to maintain some distance from these people.
Also the old saying is that relatives and fish smell after 3 days. Three weeks is a really long time. Maybe go for 3 weeks and spend the middle 10 days somewhere nice, without the family.
This is all expensive. That's a good reason to only go every other year.