Letters to the Editor
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It is right to have low self esteem
After all, you are contemplating becoming a lawyer.
That in itself is legitimate cause for low self esteem.
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Concrete advice from a former imposter
Hey there. My experience was much like yours. A little practical advice: First, get the computer-based bar prep course (MicroMash, as I recall) unless you are already in a class. The classes would probably have helped me by making me show up at a certain time, but in their absence, the computer-based quizzing was invaluable, and also helped me know how close I was to pass-worthy.
Second, don't settle into a job until you find your place. Very cliche, I know. I just barely scraped by on my bar exam. So, when I wasn't very good at my first job, I figured that fit. But then I jumped rather impulsively for a public defender position, which turned out to make me feel--tada!--smart again. It was wonderful--my strengths showed and my weaknesses were minimally noticable. I even got the praise I badly needed. So hunt around until you find your place.
Good luck.
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the first thing we do, let's
I love how all the lawyers responding have to make sure to tell the LW that they, too, are super duper smart in great detail, before they bother to provide any useful advice. Apparently, insecurity from grad school never goes away, no matter what claims to the contrary. Apparently, a lot of people out there still have their ego wrapped up in that 4.0 that they earned years ago.
I don't see a bunch of letter writers who have moved on from grad school. Rather I see a lot of people who are still invested in the image of them as special, a cut above the common herd. I'll remember this and not be intimidated if I ever need to hire a lawyer.
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Bar Exam versus Law School
The skills required to pass the bar are not at all similar to those required to excel in law school. Just do exactly what the instructors and workbooks at Bar-Bri (or whatever bar review course you are taking) tell you to do, and you will pass. And even though you are a good writer, do not be seduced by the essays; your study time is much better spent on ensuring that you ace the multi-state multiple choice section.
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Reaching
Ah...Mr. Tennis, even though you're words are quite wise - as usual, but the outcome of the dtruggle is not always left in the hands of the privileged....sometimes, those of us with tenacity breach their ranks because they also need us, the common man.
So, chin up, young blue-collar rebel. Pick a goal, stay focused and remember the fight is difficult for most of us; the fight is even difficult for some of those in the top one percent of the nation. They just don't show their scars as readily as we do.