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You should stop calling your parents. Send them birthday cards, Christmas cards, nice letters telling them how you're doing, but you should stop calling them, because they appear to be so manipulative. If they call you, feel free to talk, but do not allow them to manipulate. Be straightforward, direct and calm about what is going on in the call, say that you can't have a conversation like that and hang up if you must. Communication by letter will be sufficient for your obligations. If they want to talk, they will call, but do it on your terms. They need to start acting like adults, and it will be painful to help them do so, but you need to do it and stop phoning them.
